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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28115787">Home For Christmas</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_communist_unicorn/pseuds/the_communist_unicorn'>the_communist_unicorn</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Again your eyes did not deceive you, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Christmas, Custody Battle, Dom Castiel/Sub Dean Winchester, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, Idiots in Love, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Kid Fic, Light BDSM, M/M, Mentions of Dean/Cas/Others, Mentions of dubious consent, Omega Castiel/Alpha Dean Winchester, Only One Bed, Panic Attacks, Romance, Roommates, Self Hating/Toxic Thoughts, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester, Yes you read that right, mentions of mpreg, not between dean and cas, not explicit, offensive language</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-20 11:55:30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>24,642</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28115787</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_communist_unicorn/pseuds/the_communist_unicorn</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel got pregnant in his freshman year of college after spending his heat with his boyfriend Luc. Having no interest in mating Luc but unable to balance classes, work, and caring for a newborn all on his own, he reluctantly gave his son, Jack, to his brother Michael and sister-in-law Hannah while he finished school and got on his feet. Five years later, Castiel has a job, a solid savings account, and a house, but Michael is still waffling about whether Castiel is really ready to take responsibility for Jack. His latest excuse: that it's better for a child to grow up in a two parent home with both alpha and omega role models, so until Castiel is mated, it's in Jack's best interest to remain with Michael and Hannah. </p><p>So Castiel enlists the help of Dean, his alpha roommate and best friend (with occasional benefits), to pose as his fiance. It's a foolproof plan really. People are always mistaking them for a couple for some reason, so why not use that to their advantage? Of course, there's the teensy problem that Castiel has been secretly in love with Dean for years, and playing a happy couple for however long it takes to convince Michael might just send him into full on pining sickness. But for Jack, he'll risk it.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Castiel/Dean Winchester</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>106</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>171</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Destiel Writers &amp; Readers, The Destiel Fan Survey Favs Collection</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/MandalaRose/gifts">MandalaRose</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>First of all, if you've been following The Secret Ingredient, please don't panic. I have not abandoned it. I will be coming back to that one in February with a very special Valentine's Day chapter. 😉</p><p>This was written for the Secret Santa Fic Exchange in the Destiel-Writers &amp; Readers group on Facebook. My giftee was <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/MandalaRose/pseuds/MandalaRose">MandalaRose</a>, and Manda, can you guess what I did when I found out I would be writing for <em>you</em>? I squeed so loud I scared the dog! 😂 I think I managed to work in almost every single one of the tropes you requested except the hockey. I hope you enjoy it. I'm certainly having fun writing it.   </p><p>A few thank yous are in order before we begin. First and always, to my husband AJ. This has been one hell of a year, and I honestly don't think I could have survived it without you, neshama.   </p><p>Second, to my editor and best friend, <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/EyumdaRelmera">EyumdaRelmera</a>. From wrangling my ellipsis to making sure I didn't forget about Dean's glasses to teaching me about safe BDSM practices, you have made this story infinitely better than I ever could have on my own, and you have made my life infinitely brighter with your mere presence. 🦄💖😸. </p><p>And last but definitely not least, to <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/lotrspnfangirl/pseuds/lotrspnfangirl">lotrspnfangirl</a>, who not only beta'd this for me, but also organized the whole Fic Exchange in the first place and matched me up with Mandala whose list of trope requests sparked this idea. So this story literally would not exist without you, Dani.    </p><p>This story is a WIP and will <em>hopefully</em> update once a week. Please be patient with me if I miss a week here and there. It's been a rough year, and my mental health has taken a beating.   </p><p>If you have any questions or need spoilers before you feel comfortable reading, come find me on Facebook (Koby Kuznetz) or Tumblr (the-communist-unicorn).</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>                                                         </p><p>Dean jolted awake as the front door slammed so hard the windows vibrated. He sat up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes and groping for his glasses among the takeout containers on the coffee table, the debris of his lonely dinner. He didn't need to see to know who had slammed the door as the rotting leaves and stagnant water smell of Cas' anger was assaulting his nose as badly as the noise had assaulted his ears. But once the blurry figure in front of him came into focus, he saw that Cas wasn't just ordinary pissed. The omega was pale and shaking, his eyes  glowing blue lightning and his face ashen. His expression was simultaneously livid and terrified. </p><p>Dean leapt up and tugged Cas over to the couch, pushing him down and sitting next to him. He could tell from the way Cas pliantly let the alpha lead him that he wasn't fully present in his own body, so Dean quietly held his hand, waiting for him to come back from wherever he'd gone. It was a miracle that Cas had made it safely home in this state. </p><p>Finally Cas spoke, his voice flat and toneless. "I'm sorry I woke you." </p><p>"It's okay," Dean reassured him. "Just tell me what happened. I take it family dinner didn't go well." </p><p>Cas snorted. "Dinner was fine, Hannah's cooking notwithstanding. It was after dinner that things went to hell. Once Jack was in bed, I showed Michael the bank statements like you suggested. The numbers speak for themselves. I am more than ready to provide a stable home for Jack. They <em>promised</em> that when I was on my feet, they would relinquish custody back to me." Cas' voice was growing less flat and emotionless, rising to match his scent. </p><p>Dean's heart sank. "What was his excuse this time?" </p><p>The hand Dean wasn't holding balled into a fist on Cas' thigh, nails digging neat little crescents into his palm. "That it's 'better for a child to grow up in a two parent home with both alpha and omega role models'," Cas parroted bitterly. "So until I'm mated, they feel that it's in Jack's 'best interest' to remain with them." </p><p>"That's bullshit." </p><p>"I know," Cas said, rolling his eyes, a little of his usual sassy self peeking through, "but I did make them Jack's legal guardians, idiot that I was, so —"</p><p>"You weren't an idiot," Dean interrupted. "You were trying to take care of your kid, and you didn't have a lot of options at the time. You couldn't know that they would break their promise. They were your family!"<br/> <br/>Cas didn't look comforted. In fact he suddenly looked guilty, the sour scent of it rising to Dean's nose. He disentangled his fingers from Dean's and avoided the alpha's eyes. "There's more." </p><p>Dread curled in the pit of Dean's stomach. He pictured Michael introducing Cas to some rich, handsome, nice smelling alpha, promising that as soon as they mated and married, he could have Jack to raise with his new husband. Or wife. From Cas' stories about his childhood, Dean had gathered that his family were old-fashioned. They would probably prefer to see Cas mated to a female alpha if it was up to them. </p><p>Either way, the thought made Dean feel sick to his stomach, which was weird. Their little arrangement was far from monogamous, and it had never bothered Dean that Cas let other alphas fuck him. He even got to watch sometimes which was all kinds of hot. </p><p>But mating… mating was different. Cas wouldn't just be warming another alpha's bed for a night or a weekend. He would <em>belong</em> to the alpha, and Dean would never be allowed to touch him again, not even to just put an arm around him while they watched <em>Dr. Sexy</em> together on the couch, or to kiss him chastely on the lips. </p><p>And he highly doubted that any alpha chosen by Michael would appreciate or accommodate Cas' particular preferences in the bedroom. No, they would want him to meekly present for them every night or else lie docilely on his back like a dog showing its belly. Cas would spend the rest of his life miserable and unsatisfied, but he'd endure it. For Jack he would do anything. </p><p>"Please believe me, Dean," Cas was saying, gaze locked on the floor and wringing his hands. "I… I didn't mean to do it. I… I just panicked. He was going on and on about mating, and I couldn't think. I had to say <em>something</em> to shut him up." </p><p>Dean's world was crumbling around him. Maybe he was still asleep and this was a bad dream; he prayed for that. He'd long been prepared for the possibility that Cas would fall in love someday. He knew that Cas didn't feel about him the same way he felt about the omega which was why he'd always kept those feelings strictly to himself and never asked for more than Cas could give. So if someone had come along who made Cas as happy as Cas made Dean, Dean would have let him go. It would hurt like hell, but not like this. To lose him like <em>this</em>, watch him marry some rich knothead who didn't even know how lucky they were, who would make him suppress his true nature and play the good, submissive little omega… that was worse than anything else Dean could imagine. This burned inside him. </p><p>"So I told him you were courting me and we were talking about mating soon." </p><p>"Wait. What?" In the grip of his own panic, Dean had almost missed what Cas said. </p><p>Cas, mistaking the lingering acrid notes of grief in Dean's scent for anger, hid his face in his hands. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'll call them tomorrow and tell them it was a lie." </p><p>"Are you kidding?! No! Cas, this is perfect!" </p><p>Cas separated his fingers the barest inch and peered through them. "It is?" he said skeptically. </p><p>"Yes! Don't you see?" Dean dragged Cas' hands away from his face and squeezed them. "We pretend to be a couple just long enough to convince your brother that you're settling down." </p><p>It wouldn't be that hard. People were always assuming they were a couple no matter how many times they explained that you didn't need to have romantic feelings for someone in order to express your affection for them physically. (Well, the fact was that Dean <em>did</em> actually have romantic feelings for Cas, but that is entirely irrelevant. Cas is twice as touchy feely as Dean is.) </p><p>"Once they sign over custody and it's all legal, we can drop the act. There's no law against unmated omegas raising kids on their own. It's just stuck up knotheads like Michael who think there should be." </p><p>A smile was finally, <em>finally</em> breaking over Cas' face like a sunrise. "That could work," he said. Then he suddenly turned wide blue eyes on Dean, and fuck, did he have any idea what that did to Dean's heart? "You would really do that for me?" </p><p>"To help you get your son back? Of course I will." <em>And, y'know, because I'm hopelessly in love with you and stuff,</em> Dean added silently. Yes, pretending to be Cas' almost-mate would be no hardship. He'd just have to be careful not to pretend too well and tip off his best friend and sometimes casual lover to his decidedly un-platonic and non-casual feelings for him.  </p><p>Cas was calming down, but Dean could still scent the sour notes of grief and panic in the air. He let go of one of the omega's hands and gently cupped the back of his neck, drawing him in. Cas understood immediately what Dean was offering, happily burying his nose in Dean's scent gland and breathing deep. Dean wrapped his arms around the omega and leaned back into the couch cushions so that they could scent each other in comfort. </p><p>Soon, Cas smelled clean and verdant again, like a rain washed forest, but he made no attempt to leave Dean's arms, and Dean definitely wasn't going to tell him to. He secretly liked cuddling even more than sex, and cuddling with Cas was better than sex and pie put togeth-<br/> <br/>Well, it could certainly give pie some stiff competition. </p><p>A while later, Cas' scent changed again, taking on the electric tang of a thunderstorm. Like Pavlov's dog, Dean's dick instantly chubbed up in response. </p><p>"Color?" Cas murmured, his mouth so close to Dean's ear that Dean could feel his lips move and the flick of his tongue.</p><p>"Green," Dean said hoarsely. </p><p>Cas drew back and gave him a searching look. "You're sure? You're not just saying that because<em> I</em> need it tonight?" </p><p>"No. I want to, Omega." </p><p>Cas nodded, satisfied that Dean was telling the truth. Then the lines of his face seemed to sharpen as he slipped into his Dom persona, and Dean's dick gave another desperate twitch. "I'm going to take a shower. Go to my room, undress, and wait for me. May I fuck you tonight?" </p><p>Dean's pants were getting painfully tight. "Yes, please, Omega," he said, his voice squeaking a little. </p><p>Cas smiled like a cat that got the cream. "Then you may prep yourself while you wait. You may give yourself as much pleasure as you wish while doing so, but you may not come. And I give you fair warning," he raised one eyebrow in that way of his that always made Dean's blood boil, "I'm not going to go easy on you tonight, and if you come before I tell you to, I will be <em>very</em> disappointed. Do you understand?" </p><p>"Yes, Omega." </p><p>"Good. Then go wait for me." </p><p>The townhouse they rented together had three bedrooms. One was Dean's, one was Cas', and one was Jack's when he spent the weekend with Cas. Hopefully, one day soon, Jack would live there full time. Dean wasn't sure how having a kid in the house would affect their arrangement, but even if Cas didn't want to scene anymore, Dean could live with that. It would be a small price to pay for Cas to be able to tuck his kid in and read him a bedtime story every night. The sadness in Cas' eyes every time Jack went back to Michael and Hannah's after a visit just killed Dean. </p><p>He heard the shower start down the hall as he went into Cas' room. It was nothing like the popular image of a BDSM "sex dungeon" or whatever the kids were calling it these days. Cas had a normal bedroom with a king size bed, nightstand, and dresser. The headboard <em>was</em> upholstered in black faux leather with silver studs, but it was mostly hidden behind a truly absurd number of navy, black, and cream throw pillows that matched the pattern on the thick navy blue comforter. </p><p>There was a double picture frame on the nightstand. One side held a picture that Dean had taken of Cas in the hospital, looking exhausted but happy, cradling newborn Jack to his chest. The infant's hair was still damp and plastered flat to his tiny skull from squeezing his way out of his father. The other side of the frame showed a chubby five-year-old laying in a pile of fallen leaves in the townhouse's backyard. Cas had taken the picture with his phone on Jack's last visit, and even though it was a little blurry because Cas was a terrible photographer, Jack looked happier than he ever did in the pictures Hannah occasionally emailed to Cas.   </p><p> </p><p>Dean took a deep breath and pushed away his anger on Cas' behalf and his worry that even if their ruse worked, Michael would just find another half-baked excuse to keep Cas' kid from him. Cas was stressed enough for both of them. It was Dean's job to help him relax and forget about the world outside the scene. Within the scene, there was no stress or worry because there was no uncertainty. Cas was in complete control for as long as Dean let him be.  </p><p>~o0o~</p><p>While Castiel waited for the water to warm up, the panic that had been held at bay by Dean's warm, familiar maple scent started to creep back in. </p><p>What was he thinking agreeing to this? Of course Dean would offer to back up Castiel's lie. He would have done the same for any of his friends in similar circumstances. But it was a miracle that Castiel had made it through five years of friendship and fucking without letting slip that he was head over heels for the sweet, shy, gentle, gorgeous alpha. How was he going to pretend to be almost mated to Dean without hopelessly confusing his inner omega and breaking his own heart? </p><p>No, he couldn't do it. He would just have to tell Dean he'd changed his mind… </p><p>Except… </p><p>Except Castiel couldn't think of another plan with the same chance of success. He and Dean were always getting mistaken for a couple because of how much they hugged, cuddled, and scented each other. (Of course, Castiel did these things because they allowed him to pretend for a few minutes at a time that they <em>were</em> a couple, that Dean was really his alpha. Dean did it because he was a tactile person who just liked cuddling.) It shouldn't be too hard to convince Michael that they were in a relationship and that Dean would be a good alpha role model for Jack. Then Castiel would get his son back, and that was worth a thousand broken hearts. </p><p>He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. <em>I can do this. For Jack, I can do this. </em></p><p>He didn't rush his shower. Scening while anxious, scared, angry, or in the grip of any other strong negative emotion was dangerous and irresponsible. He closed his eyes, focused on the feeling of the water hitting his back, and imagined that it was washing away all his fury at Michael and all his fears for the future. Instead of Michael's smug, holier-than-thou expression when he told Castiel he couldn't have his son back, he pictured Dean… </p><p>Dean fingering himself open in Castiel's bed, filling the room with the smoky, spicy scent of alpha arousal. Castiel's cock quickly grew heavy at the thought, and slick began to trickle from his ass only to be washed away by the water, but he didn't touch himself beyond what was necessary to get clean. He wanted to be able to take his time with Dean, give him as much pleasure as he could stand before finally allowing them both to come. </p><p>After almost half an hour under the warm spray, he was completely calm and also completely hard, the thunderstorm scent of his own arousal infusing the clouds of steam that filled the bathroom. He turned off the water, dried himself, and dumped his towel and dirty clothes down the laundry chute before walking naked to his bedroom where he was greeted by a sight that was equal parts hot and adorable. </p><p>Dean was sitting on the bed, wearing nothing but his glasses, trying unsuccessfully to loop one of Castiel's neckties around his own wrists. "Son of a bitch," he muttered as the slippery silk got away from him, probably not for the first time. </p><p>"Would you like some help with that?" Castiel asked, doing his best to keep all traces of amusement from his face and voice. </p><p>Dean startled and looked up, a blush tingeing his freckled cheeks. He opened his mouth, closed it again, and then wordlessly held out the tie. </p><p>Castiel took it. He knew Dean often had trouble asking for what he wanted, especially when it was the exact opposite of what he'd been taught an alpha was supposed to want, so Castiel didn't insist on a formal request, merely asked, "What is your safe word?" </p><p>"Poughkeepsie." </p><p>"Are you using it now?" </p><p>"No, Omega." </p><p>"Would you prefer I tie your hands behind your back or above your head?" </p><p>"Over my head please, Omega." </p><p>"Then lie down." </p><p>Dean obeyed, his head resting on one of Castiel's feather pillows. He had turned down the covers and stacked the extra pillows neatly in the corner even though he hadn't been told to do that. He knew Castiel liked to keep his space orderly, especially during a scene. </p><p>Castiel crawled up the bed and straddled Dean's chest. Dean's eyes raked over the omega's body, lingering on the tattoos on Castiel's biceps, black wings fanning out from his shoulder blades to his elbows, before his gaze was irresistibly drawn to the hard cock bobbing right in front of his face, a bead of pre-come welling from the tip. He licked his lips. It was a myth that male omegas had underdeveloped penises. Dean might be a little longer than Castiel, his knot adding on an inch or so, but Castiel was definitely a fully developed adult male, even a little thicker around than Dean, and Dean loved sucking a cock almost as much as he liked getting fucked by one.<br/> <br/>Castiel read the desire in Dean's eyes and was sorely tempted to indulge it, but he had a realistic idea of his ability to control himself once he had Dean's mouth on him, so he shook his head regretfully. "Not tonight, Alpha. I need to last long enough to fuck you until you scream." </p><p>Dean's pupils, already dilated with lust, blew so wide that only the thinnest ring of green was visible behind his glasses, and a choked moan escaped him. </p><p>"Hmmm. You like the sound of that?" Castiel murmured, lifting Dean's hands over his head and beginning to bind them with the necktie, keeping his movements deliberately slow so that Dean could savor the feeling of the silk gliding over his skin. </p><p>Dean nodded mutely. </p><p>"Yes, it's one of your favorite things, isn't it? Being tied up and fucked until you're begging to come?" </p><p>Another nod, this one accompanied by a faint whimper. </p><p>Castiel raised an imperious eyebrow. He had let Dean off the hook once already tonight. He couldn't be <em>too</em> lenient. "Say it. Tell me with words or I'll untie you right now and you can take care of that hard on without my help." It wasn't an empty threat, and Dean knew it. Castiel had followed through on it before, much to Dean's chagrin, and Castiel would only wait so long for Dean to work up the courage to speak. <br/> <br/>Dean met Castiel's eyes, his cheeks flaming, and said quietly but clearly, "I love being tied up and fucked on your cock. Please fuck me, Omega." There was a defiant tilt to his chin, but Castiel knew it wasn't defiance of his Dom. It was defiance of everyone else, the whole world that had told him all his life that this was the wrong way for an alpha to be, that no 'real alpha' enjoyed getting fucked more than he enjoyed doing the fucking, and certainly no 'real alpha' let an omega tie him up and boss him around. </p><p>Castiel gently cupped Dean's cheek, suddenly overwhelmed with so much love for this man. "My good Alpha," he murmured, and Dean shivered under him at the praise. "Test that binding for me." </p><p>Dean moved his wrists. "It's good." </p><p>"Not too tight?" </p><p>"No, Omega. It's comfortable." </p><p>"Good. Let me know if that changes." Castiel climbed off Dean's chest and grabbed one of the other pillows. "Lift your hips." </p><p>Dean braced his feet on the bed and let Castiel slide the pillow under his lower back. The smoky scent of his arousal mingled with Castiel's own thunderstorm scent like a warm, cozy fireplace on a wild and wet night. </p><p>Speaking of wet, Castiel's ass was leaking like a tap, and there was no point letting good slick go to waste just because he wasn't the one getting fucked. Even though Dean had never explicitly said so, Castiel had noticed that the alpha really liked using Castiel's slick in place of artificial lube. He reached back and gathered some on his fingers before testing Dean's entrance. </p><p>Dean let out a groan of pure pleasure as Castiel pushed two fingers into him. He had done a pretty thorough job of preparing himself, and Castiel was quickly able to work up to three, then four fingers. The lightest of touches to Dean's prostate had the alpha purring and throwing his head back, exposing the whole column of his throat to the omega in the ultimate sign of submission. </p><p>This was Castiel's favorite thing about sex with Dean; he had the privilege of witnessing that moment when Dean let go of all those preconceptions about alpha-ness and just obeyed his instincts, becoming truly himself. "There you are," Castiel whispered, leaning down to lick a stripe from Dean's jugular to his scent gland. "My good, beautiful Alpha." </p><p>He gathered more of his slick to lube up his cock and finally entered Dean. As sappy as it sounded, even in his head, it really was like coming home. He had been with a few female omegas and one male beta who let him top sometimes, but it had never felt this right, this perfect. Dean was so responsive, so beautifully loud. He rarely used words during sex unless Castiel demanded it, but he keened, and moaned, and gasped with every thrust. His hands twisted relentlessly in the bindings, not trying to escape, just feeling them, reminding himself that they were there. </p><p>As soon as he felt Dean start to tense up around him, winding tight with his building climax, Castiel stopped and pulled out. Dean gave a frustrated whine, but didn't complain when he realized he wasn't going to get to come yet. "Color?" Castiel asked breathlessly. </p><p>"Green." </p><p>Castiel smiled and rewarded him with a lick to his scent gland. When he was sure that Dean wasn't on the edge anymore, he added more slick and pushed inside again. Shallow, gentle thrusts at first, working up to a faster rhythm, and stopping as soon as the tension in Dean's muscles and the strength of Dean's scent let him know the alpha was close. </p><p>Each time he checked in with Dean, and each time Dean gave him permission to keep going until after the fifth time he edged Dean, the response was a hesitant, "… yellow." </p><p>"What's wrong?" Castiel asked. "Is it starting to hurt?" </p><p>"Yeah. I think I almost popped a knot that time."</p><p>"Okay. Thank you for telling me, Alpha. You can come this time. Whenever you're ready." Castiel wasn't sure he could have lasted much longer himself anyway. </p><p>He re-slicked his cock one more time. When he pushed back into Dean, the alpha gave a contented sigh, completely surrendering to the pleasure now that he knew he didn't have to hold back or control himself anymore. </p><p>Castiel still took it slow, coaxing Dean gently toward climax, but as they both drew closer, his movements inevitably became faster and less coordinated. Dean was making breathless <em>uh</em> and <em>ah</em> noises every time Castiel punched into his prostate, getting louder and louder, and then he did indeed scream, his back arching off the bed as he painted his chest white. His knot popped completely untouched, and Castiel reached down to squeeze it, milking a second orgasm from him that was even more violent than the first. </p><p>With Dean writhing and moaning and coming over and over beneath him, all Castiel really had to do was stop trying <em>not</em> to come. His vision whited out as he finally allowed himself the blessed relief of spilling inside Dean. </p><p>When he came back to himself, Dean was gazing hazily up at him, clearly high on endorphins. With trembling fingers Castiel unbound Dean's hands. He also removed Dean's glasses and laid them carefully on the nightstand, before laying down and gathering the alpha into his arms to cuddle and scent and lick him while they came out of the scene. He made no attempt to clean them up. Being covered in each other's come, the most primal form of scent marking, would help keep them from dropping.</p><p>About half an hour passed before Dean came back to himself. Castiel could tell when he was becoming aware again because his hand which had been laying limply on Castiel's arm began to move, deliberately tracing the lines of Castiel's tattoos. "Are you back with me, Dean?" Castiel asked, using his name instead of Alpha to signal that the scene was over.</p><p>Dean made a noise halfway between a sigh and a purr. "Yeah. Just don't ask me to stand up any time soon. Legs feel like jelly." </p><p>Castiel chuckled. "I imagine you'll have some trouble sitting comfortably tomorrow as well." </p><p>"You don't have to sound so smug about it," Dean muttered, but there was no rancor behind the words.  </p><p>"Thank you, Dean," Castiel whispered, stroking the alpha's sweaty hair.<br/> <br/>Dean huffed a laugh into Castiel's shoulder. "You don't have to thank me for sex, Cas." </p><p>"Not just for the sex. For everything. For helping me get my son back. For being…" His heart broke a little to say it, but he knew it was the truth. "For being a good friend." </p><p>Dean was quiet for a minute, and Castiel would have thought he had fallen asleep if his hand hadn't still been moving, lightly tracing the ink feathers on Castiel's right arm repeatedly. Finally he murmured, "Don't have to thank me for that either." </p><p>Castiel decided that aftercare was not a good time for a discussion of Dean's sometimes excessive selflessness, so he let it go. </p><p>It was Dean who next broke the silence. "You know, if we're gonna sell the whole almost mated thing, you should probably have a claiming bite." </p><p>Castiel couldn't help tensing up a little. The alpha he was desperately in love with offering to claim him while they were laying in bed together, sweaty and satisfied and covered in each other's scent? Yeah, no amount of logic would convince his inner omega that that was just Dean being a good friend. </p><p>Dean mistook his tension for discomfort at the idea of Dean biting him and quickly said, "We don't have to. We could fake it with makeup or something." </p><p>"No. It's better if it's real. We don't want to give them any reason to doubt our story. Do you want to do it now?" </p><p>Dean lifted his head to look at Castiel. "You're sure?" </p><p>Castiel closed his eyes, an indescribable feeling, not quite happy and not quite sad, filling his chest. "I'm sure. It's just… not how I imagined it. You know?" </p><p>No, he had imagined that a claiming bite from Dean would be followed by a mating bite from Dean, and that both would be because the alpha had fallen as deeply in love with him as he had with Dean. </p><p>"I know," Dean said softly, though Castiel was quite sure he didn't. "You can still have that someday, Cas. When you… when you meet the right person."<br/> <br/>Castiel didn't think he could take much more of this conversation without blurting out the truth, so without opening his eyes, he tilted his head to the side, baring his scent gland to Dean in a silent invitation.</p><p>"Okay. I'll, um… I'll try to be gentle." </p><p>"Not <em>too</em> gentle. It has to leave a mark." </p><p>He felt Dean lean in, felt the alpha's teeth scrape his neck, and guiltily allowed himself to pretend that all his dreams had somehow come true. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>A few <strong>trigger warnings</strong> for this chapter. Please note I've added the tag "John Winchester's A+ Parenting". That applies mostly to this chapter, but also a few things in later chapters. There is also an explicit reference to Castiel's pregnancy and the judgment he faced for being an unmated pregnant teenager. This is not meant to imply any judgment of teen pregnancy or single parents on my part. I believe that everyone should have the right to make their own decisions in that situation, free of moral judgment. </p><p>Now on with the idiots in love. Oh, yeah, I added that tag too. Can't believe I forgot it.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dean had learned early on in his teaching career that the day before Christmas vacation was no time to expect kids to sit still and focus on math and spelling, so his class of eighteen six-year-olds had taken over the school kitchen and were spending the last day of term baking cookies. It was loud, messy, barely controlled chaos. With his TA, Charlie, along to help, Dean was in his element.</p><p>"Benjamin Braeden, you put one more piece of dough in your mouth and you won't be taking any cookies home. You hear me?" Dean raised his eyebrows warningly at the boy who was sneaking tiny bites of the dough he was supposed to be cutting his cookies from. </p><p>Ben's eyes widened at the dire threat, and he hastily swallowed what was in his mouth before Dean could also make him spit it out into the garbage.  </p><p>Dean knew there were people, and plenty of his coworkers were among them, who thought this was a strange career choice for an alpha. Alphas might become high school teachers or college professors, but chasing after little kids, preventing them from eating things they shouldn't, wiping their noses, and patiently cleaning up their accidents was 'an omega job'. However, Dean didn't care if they laughed behind his back. Screw them. He loved his job, he loved his kids, and since the only omega he ever wanted to mate only saw him as a friend, this was probably the closest he'd ever get to being a dad. </p><p>Once all the cookies were lined up on baking sheets, with each row neatly labeled with a child's name, and slid into the giant industrial oven, he and Charlie herded their charges out to the cafeteria and got them seated at one of the long tables. Charlie handed out holiday themed coloring sheets and crayons, broke up a few spats over elbow room and coveted colors, and then joined Dean at the end of the table where he was trying not to be too obvious about squirming in his seat in search of a comfortable position for his sore ass. </p><p>"Got ants in your pants, Winchester?" Charlie said quietly under the high pitched chatter of the kids gossiping about what Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa presents they were hoping to get. </p><p>Dean gave her a flat look and mouthed a silent, <em>fuck you</em>.<br/>
 <br/>
She chuckled. "Was it worth it at least?" </p><p>He knew she meant the soreness, but his mind automatically went to the feeling of digging his teeth into Cas' neck, marking the omega as his. Intellectually he knew it was all part of the plan to convince Michael to give Cas custody, but his inner alpha didn't understand that. All it knew was that it was finally allowed to claim the omega it had been low key pining for for five years. It fully expected mating bites to be exchanged in the near future, and when they weren't…</p><p>An unfulfilled claim almost always led to pining sickness for the alpha. The severity depended on the depth of the emotional bond with the omega, so yeah, it was gonna be bad. A couple weeks at least of feeling like shit, and his next rut would be torture. But if it helped Cas get his kid back, then, "Yeah. It's worth it." </p><p>Charlie gave him a funny look, obviously sensing that he wasn't just talking about a night of epic sex, but before she could pry any deeper, there was an outraged shriek. "No! <em>I</em> get the blue next! I asked first!" </p><p>While Charlie dealt with that, Dean ducked into the kitchen to check on the cookies. He was not hiding, he told himself, it was just very important that the cookies didn't burn. The kids would be disappointed <em>and</em> Principal Adler would be pissed if they set off the smoke alarm. There were still five minutes left on the timer though, and the cookies looked just fine, but Dean stayed in the kitchen, peering through the oven door at the perfectly unburnt cookies. So maybe he was hiding. <em>Just a little</em>. </p><p>The problem was that he had stupidly told Charlie that he was in love with Cas one night back in college while they were drinking together. He had sworn her to secrecy once they sobered up (okay, more like pathetically begged her not to tell anyone, <em>especially</em> Cas), but if she found out what he and Cas were planning, she would definitely have something to say about it. She liked Cas, but she wouldn't tolerate him breaking her best friend's heart, even unintentionally.</p><p>"Dean?" </p><p>Dean jumped at the sound of that gravelly voice. Cas was standing in the doorway of the kitchen, somehow managing to look just as hot in scrubs with little bumblebees all over them as he looked in everything else (or nothing at all). He had originally applied for the school nurse job because Dean was able to put in a good word for him, and because it would provide a steady paycheck and health insurance, both prerequisites of proving to Michael that he was a fit parent for Jack. But it turned out that he liked working with kids just as much as Dean did, which ended up being a bonus.</p><p>"Hey, Cas. What's up?" Dean couldn't help the way his eyes flickered to Cas' neck where his claiming mark was currently hidden with makeup since Cas hadn't wanted to deal with his coworkers asking who the lucky alpha was. Though a part of Dean wanted everyone to see it and know that Cas was <em>his</em>, however temporarily, a larger part of him understood that the fewer people who knew about their lie, the less complicated it would be when they stopped pretending. He quickly dragged his eyes back to Cas' face, hoping the omega hadn't noticed his preoccupation with the fake bite. </p><p>Cas was looking down at his phone. "Um… Hannah texted me. She wants to know if I'm bringing my alpha to Christmas dinner. What should I tell her?" He looked up at Dean again, his brow furrowed and his posture uncertain in a way it never was when he was Doming. </p><p>"Sure. I'll come," Dean agreed easily. "Perfect opportunity to prove you didn't invent me, right?"<br/>
 <br/>
"Right," Cas said slowly. "I was planning to drive out tomorrow and spend the night so I could be with Jack for Christmas morning. Is that all right?" </p><p>"Yeah. No problem. I'll visit my dad and Sam tomorrow morning and give them their presents, and then we can hit the road." </p><p>Cas was still giving him that uncertain, searching look, and Dean just wanted to wrap the omega up in a hug and kiss those frown lines off his forehead, but they were at work. "You're sure you don't mind missing Christmas with your family?" </p><p><em>That</em> was what was worrying him? "No. Dude, it's fine. You know we're not really a traditional holidays kind of family." </p><p>Cas nodded but he still didn't seem happy. Before Dean could try to figure out what was wrong and how to fix it, the oven timer dinged. </p><p>"Okay. I'll, um… I'll let you get back to your cookies," Cas said and disappeared out the door. </p><p>Dean hurried to get the cookies out of the oven before they really did burn and tried to ignore his inner alpha howling at him to go comfort his omega. </p><p>~o0o~</p><p>Sam was waiting for him outside the doors of the Shady Grove Assisted Living the morning of Christmas Eve. They hugged briefly, Dean breathing in his brother's neutral aftershave and laundry soap scent. As a beta, Sam had no distinctive natural scent which was an advantage in his profession. Witnesses and other lawyers had to rely on his face alone to read his mood, and a calm expression was much easier to fake than a calm scent. </p><p>"How've you been?" Sam asked as they let go of each other.<br/>
 <br/>
"Good. You?" </p><p>"Yeah. Good. Won a case last week. Kid's gonna get to spend Christmas with her mom instead of in a foster home." </p><p>"That's great!" Dean grinned, genuinely proud of his little brother using that fancy ass degree to fight for the underdog instead of lining his pockets defending scumbags. </p><p>They stood there a moment longer, their breath steaming in the cold air, both very aware that they were stalling, putting off the inevitable moment when they would have to go inside and face the man they grudgingly called Dad though he'd done little to earn the title. They should have just called him Sperm Donor. </p><p>"Hey, I, uh… I got you something," Sam said, digging in his pocket. </p><p>"Thought we were gonna do presents inside."</p><p>"Yeah, it's better if he doesn't see this one. I got something else to give you inside." He handed Dean a small, flat square wrapped in silver paper. </p><p>Suspicious, Dean tore it open, expecting some raunchy gag gift. It was anything but. "Thanks, Sammy," he said quietly, his eyes stinging a bit as he rubbed his thumb over the fifty dollar gift card to a local craft store. "I…" Instead of trying to put into words the feeling in his chest, he just pulled his brother into another hug, holding on a little longer this time. His mind was already racing, planning the projects he could do with his kids. Their school was hardly one of the worst, but the budget was always tight, and art supplies fancier than crayons weren't high on Adler's list of priorities. </p><p>Finally they had no choice but to go in. Jody was behind the reception desk, and she greeted them with a bright smile and a "Merry Christmas, boys". </p><p>"Merry Christmas, Jody," Sam said while Dean tried to juggle his bag of gifts and wipe the condensation off his glasses after the sudden rise in temperature. "How is he today?" </p><p>"Ornery as ever, but in a good mood. For him anyway. He's in the day room."<br/>
 <br/>
Before heading that way, Dean dipped into his gift bag and pulled out a small bottle of Fireball cinnamon whiskey with a red ribbon tied around the neck, which he handed to Jody with a little flourish. "A little birdie told me it was your favorite." </p><p>"Bobby needs to stop telling all my secret vices," Jody grumped lightly and smiled. She didn't sound mad, and her leather and evergreen scent got a little richer at the mention of her omega. </p><p>The day room wasn't crowded since most people visited their loved ones  on Christmas Day. In the far corner stood a tree which the staff had decorated with both store-bought ornaments and ones the residents had made. Colorful paper chains were strung in random droops across the ceiling, and someone had painted festive designs on the edges of the windows. All in all, they'd managed to impose a homey holiday feel on the institutional room. John Winchester had parked his wheelchair in front of the TV and was ignoring everything around him. </p><p>"Hey, Dad," Dean said brightly, clapping John on the shoulder.<br/>
 <br/>
John looked up in surprise. "What are you doing here? Wasn't expecting to see you until tomorrow." </p><p>"Yeah, I can't make it tomorrow. I've got a thing. So we came today instead." He sat down on a couch, hoping John would leave it at that, but of course he wasn't that lucky.</p><p>"A thing? What kind of thing?" John demanded. His smoke and whiskey scent grew sharper with suspicion, and Dean tried not to breathe the heavy scent too deeply. He vaguely remembered a time when he'd found his father's scent comforting, but for most of his life it had just turned his stomach. </p><p>Dean glanced over at Sam who had sat down beside him. Sam shrugged in a <em>'</em><em>tell him or don't, your call'</em>  gesture. John had yet to acknowledge his younger son's presence, so it was probably going to be one of those visits where Dean had to repeat Sam's questions before John would answer them. </p><p>"I, um…" Screw it, Dean decided, and went all in. "I'm spending Christmas with my boyfriend and his family. They invited me and I said yes. He really wants me to meet them." </p><p>John's eyebrows rose. "Boyfriend? Omega?"</p><p>Dean gritted his teeth. "Yes, Dad. He's an omega." </p><p>John harrumphed in approval, his scent mellowing out. "Well, sounds serious if you're already meeting the family. Bout time you settled down. When do I get to meet this omega of yours?"<br/>
 <br/>
"I'll bring him round after the holidays," Dean lied. On his next visit he would just have to tell John that he and the omega had broken up and deal with the consequences of that, probably another lecture about how if he acted more like a proper alpha he would have been mated long ago. Thank god John had never found out exactly how un-alpha-like his sexual preferences were. </p><p>"Good. I want to make sure he's good enough for my only son."<br/>
 <br/>
Dean flinched, but he tried to keep the hurt out of his scent. He knew from many long years of experience that if he smelled too upset, John would taunt him about being 'so sensitive'. "I'm not—," he started to say, but he felt Sam's hand clamp down on his arm, and when he looked at his brother, Sam was shaking his head and mouthing, <em>'Don't.'</em>  Dean sighed, suddenly feeling exhausted and just wanting this whole stupid, pointless ritual over with. He took John's gift from the bag and dropped it unceremoniously in the man's lap with a more than slightly bitter, "Merry Christmas, Dad." </p><p>John picked up the classic car magazine and smiled for the first time. "Thanks, son." </p><p>After his last comment, the words were like salt in the wound, and Dean was unable to even fake a smile of his own. "Got you a year's subscription," he muttered. <em>And now I wish I hadn't wasted the money.</em> "Sam?" He held out his hand, palm up, and Sam put a small box in it, wrapped in the same silver paper he had used for Dean's gift card. Dean passed it to John who wordlessly put it in the pocket of his bathrobe. He would either open it later or throw it away depending on his mood. One year they had tried pretending that both gifts were from Dean, but John had known the truth and had spitefully thrown them both away right in front of his sons. Dean hoped Sam hadn't spent too much on the bastard, but knowing Sam, it was probably solid silver cuff links or something. </p><p>Sam's second present for Dean was a key chain in the shape of a '67 Impala. He showed Dean how the hood opened up to reveal a perfect replica of the engine, and Dean was finally able to muster up a smile. He put it on his key ring while Sam opened his present and John stared at the TV again. </p><p>"Dude!" Sam crowed excitedly when he saw the thermos with the battery powered blender blade in the bottom that could make a smoothie directly in the cup. "I love it!" </p><p>"Yeah, I figured you would, nerd," Dean said, ruffling his brother's hair.<br/>
 <br/>
Sam shoved his hand away, but he was smiling too, and at least some of the pain was gone from his eyes. </p><p>They didn't stay much longer after that. John hadn't bought presents for either of them, of course, and he seemed more interested in Jeopardy than in talking, so they left him to it, wishing Jody a Merry Christmas again on their way out. </p><p>"Dean," Sam said as they walked to their cars, "I'm really glad that things are going so well with this new boyfriend. I was starting to worry that you were gonna spend the rest of your life pining for Cas." </p><p>Dean froze mid-step. "What? I'm not… I mean, I wasn't…" </p><p>Sam gave him Bitch Face Number Five: <em>Don't even try to bullshit me. I know you too well.</em> "Dean, come on. Anyone with a nose can tell you have feelings for him, but… well, I guess it's complicated with his kid and all, so I'm glad you found someone who makes you happy. You deserve that." </p><p>Dean's stomach squirmed with guilt as he said, "Yeah. I mean, there comes a time when you gotta move on and stop waiting around for something that's never gonna happen, right?" </p><p>Sam smiled a little sadly. "Yeah. So when do I get to meet him? No pressure or anything, but I do need to make sure he's not a gold digger who's only interested in your huge house and six figure salary."</p><p>Dean laughed. "Yeah, I don't think that's a problem I'm ever gonna have. And… let's see how Christmas goes, okay?" </p><p>"Okay." Sam nodded. "Seriously, no pressure. When you're both ready."    </p><p>~o0o~</p><p>"How's your dad?"</p><p>They were about halfway to Michael's, and holiday traffic was making the relatively short trip take three times longer than usual. The occasional snowflake drifting past the windshield had them both looking apprehensively at the dirty white sky. The last thing they needed was a storm blowing in while they were driving.  </p><p>Dean's hands tightened slightly on the Impala's wheel, and the bitter scent of burnt toast filled the car. Castiel immediately regretted asking. He'd just been trying to fill the silence and distract himself from his own gnawing worry that Michael would see right through their ruse and be so angry that he'd never let Castiel have Jack back. </p><p>"Same as ever," Dean said flatly. "Ornery, stubborn, and pigheaded."<br/>
 <br/>
They lapsed back into uncomfortable silence. They were normally good at silence. In fact, quiet moments with Dean when they could just exist side by side were one of Castiel's favorite things. But ever since they'd agreed to do this fake courting, or rather ever since Dean had put a very real claiming bite on him, Castiel had been unable to settle into that peaceful, contented state he usually occupied in the alpha's company. The bite itched and burned whenever Dean was nearby, and he had to clench his hands into fists to keep from rubbing at it. </p><p>He knew what would happen when Dean didn't actually mate him. His inner omega didn't understand that mating had never been part of the plan. It would feel rejected, which meant Castiel would have to suffer through a few weeks of pining sickness (Dean probably would too, but it wouldn't be as bad for him since he wasn't in love with Castiel), and his next heat would be terrible. Toys would barely take the edge off while his body was craving one specific alpha. He was almost tempted to ask Dean to help him out, but there was a good reason they'd never shared heats or ruts in all the years of their friends with benefits arrangement. Drunk on the heady cocktail of mating hormones, Castiel couldn't trust himself not to blurt out the truth and beg Dean to bite him. </p><p>"I just don't get it," Dean said suddenly. "What does he even want?" </p><p>Castiel blinked. Still half lost in his own thoughts, it took him a second to figure out who Dean was talking about. </p><p>"It's not like Sam can stop being a beta, so why can't he just get over his disappointment and accept his son for who and what he is?" </p><p>Something twisted painfully in Castiel's chest. He knew that Dean was talking about himself as much as Sam, agonizing about all the ways he wasn't alpha enough to please John Winchester. </p><p>"The kid's a goddamn lawyer! And an amazing one at that! Most parents would be bragging to the whole fucking nursing home about that, not pretending he didn't even exist." </p><p>Castiel reached over and gently squeezed Dean's knee. "He doesn't deserve to brag about Sam's accomplishments. He had no part in them. You're the one who raised Sam. You're the one who put your dreams on hold to help him through college and law school." </p><p>Some of the tightness in Dean's jaw relaxed, and he dropped one hand off the wheel to lay over Castiel's. "I know. I just wish…" </p><p>He didn't finish the sentence, and Castiel knew that was because he wished too many things. He wished his mother was still alive. He wished his father was a different person. He wished the world would just let him be himself and enjoy the things he loved instead of trying to force him into the mold of the fucking stereotypical alpha. Castiel gave Dean's leg another squeeze. "I know. I wish that too." </p><p>Dean let go of Castiel's hand to swipe at his eyes, almost knocking his glasses off. Castiel graciously pretended not to notice, but he also kept his hand on Dean's knee. "Anyway," Dean said, pushing his glasses back up his nose, "if I'd gone to college right after high school like a normal kid, I'd never have met you." </p><p>Castiel smiled at the bittersweet memory. "And if you hadn't sat next to me in that Psych 101 class, I probably would have dropped out." No one else at their small community college had been interested in befriending the nineteen year old, pregnant, unmated omega. Only Dean had looked at his face instead of his belly. Only Dean had bothered to get to know him instead of assuming he was just a slut. </p><p>"Nah," Dean scoffed. "You would have pushed through. I've never met anyone as stubborn as you." </p><p>Castiel chuckled. "Maybe. But I would have had so much less fun." </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><strong>Up next</strong>: Dean meets the fam. How do you think it'll go? Will Michael buy it? Will he approve of Dean? Will Dean and Cas ever get their heads out of their asses? Well, of course they will because this is <em>my</em> story and I only do happy endings. 😉 But how long will these adorable idiots take? I want to hear all your thoughts. </p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>🎉 Happy New Year! 🎉 I hope 2021 is treating all of you well so far. </p><p>Thank you so much to whoever nominated this story and two others of mine for the Destiel Fan Survey Favs collection. You made my year!</p><p>There are several sensitive subjects discussed in this chapter, so I have <strong>updated the tags</strong> to reflect that and put <strong>detailed trigger warnings in the end notes</strong> for those who would prefer spoilers before reading. Be safe.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>                                                         </p><p>By the time they arrived at Michael and Hannah's house on a quiet street in a neighborhood Castiel could never afford in his wildest dreams, dark was falling and it was snowing in earnest. Dean pulled into the driveway behind Hannah's SUV, probably worried about a snow plow dinging Baby if he parked on the street. </p><p>Before they had even gotten their overnight bags out of the trunk, the front door opened, and framed in the square of warm, golden light, Castiel saw Jack jumping up and down while a smiling Hannah kept one hand on his shoulder, restraining him from running out into the snow in his socks. </p><p>As always, the sight of his son filled Castiel with a strange mixture of joy and sadness. He would never, not for one moment, regret Jack's existence even if the circumstances of his conception had been less than ideal, but he had missed so much of Jack's life while he was struggling to finish school and get on his feet. He would never get that time back, and the longer Michael hemmed and hawed about whether Castiel was really ready for the responsibility, the more moments he could feel slipping through his fingers. </p><p>"Go on," Dean said softly from beside him. "I'll get the bags. Go hug your baby."<br/> <br/>Castiel gave him a grateful smile and a quick kiss on the cheek. The kiss was uncalculated, born only of the surge of love he felt for Dean in that moment, but as he hurried up the snowy walkway, he saw Hannah's eyes flicker from him to the alpha, and her soft, pleased smile told him he had just unintentionally taken the first step in selling their lie. </p><p>Those thoughts fled as Jack leapt into his arms, squealing, "Daddy! Daddy, it's snowing! Did you see, Daddy?" as though Castiel might have somehow missed it. There was no room in his heart for guilt or sadness when he was finally holding Jack and breathing in his son's sweet peaches and cream scent. The young alpha scented his father too, and pulled back with a puzzled frown. "You smell different." </p><p>For a heart stopping instant, Castiel thought it was the bite, thought that Dean had somehow accidentally mated him without either of them noticing. Then he realized that after two and a half hours in the enclosed space of the Impala with Dean, the alpha's scent must be all over him. Jack had been exposed to it plenty on his visits to the townhouse, of course, but there it had been diffused over a relatively large area and lacked the visceral immediacy of the alpha's physical presence. Every time Jack visited, Dean spent the weekend away at Sam's, Charlie's, or Benny's so as not to intrude on Castiel's limited father-son bonding time. </p><p>"That's because I brought a friend with me this time," Castiel said just as, right on cue, Dean came in with their bags. "Jack, this is Dean. I've told you about him, remember? He lives with me."<br/> <br/>Jack raised his hand in a shy wave. "Hello." </p><p>"Hi, Jack," Dean said, setting down the bags. "It's nice to meet you. We've actually met before, but you won't remember. You were about this big." He held his thumb and index finger less than an inch apart. </p><p>"I was not!" Jack protested indignantly. "I was never that little!" </p><p>"Well, maybe a bit bigger than that," Dean conceded, "but you're much bigger now." </p><p>Jack puffed up proudly, all shyness forgotten. "I'm the tallest kid in my playgroup. I'm even taller than the other alpha kids." </p><p>"I'll bet you are."</p><p>Castiel smiled at how deftly Dean had put Jack at ease. The alpha would make such a good father someday. He hastily squashed that thought before his inner omega could wake up and start daydreaming about black-haired, green-eyed babies with freckles and Dean's sweet smile. </p><p>Dean turned to Hannah. "You have a beautiful home. Thanks for inviting me." </p><p>"Nonsense," she said, casting a sly glance at the claiming bite peeking above the collar of Castiel's shirt. "You're practically family." </p><p>Since they were supposed to be a couple, naturally the guest room they were shown to had only one king-sized bed. When Hannah and Jack left them alone to unpack and settle in (Jack was persuaded to leave his father's side with the promise that he could 'help' mash the potatoes for dinner), Castiel looked sidelong at Dean. "I guess it's a good thing we actually do share a bed sometimes," he said in an attempt to lighten the mood, "or this would be <em>really</em> awkward." </p><p>Dean laughed as Castiel had hoped he would, and even if it was a little weak, it dispelled some of the tension. "I assume you want the right side as usual," Dean said, already moving to deposit his wallet and phone on the nightstand to the left of the bed.</p><p>"Yes. Thank you." </p><p>They moved around each other, getting settled, and it was almost easy, almost comfortable, but there was still that lingering tension. It was all suddenly very real. They were actually doing this, and one misstep while they were in this house could destroy Castiel's last chance of getting his son back, but somehow that wasn't the worst part. The risk of Michael catching them in a lie didn't scare Castiel half as much as the nagging feeling that this was going to spell the end of their friendship; that something had been irreparably broken between them the second that Dean bit him, that he <em>let</em> Dean bite him, knowing it didn't mean the same thing to the alpha that it meant to Castiel. </p><p>"He looks like you." </p><p>Castiel turned from hanging his clothes for tomorrow in the closet. Dean was staring out the window at the falling snow. His expression reflected in the dark glass was indecipherable. </p><p>"I mean, I've seen pictures, but I haven't actually seen him since he was a baby. He's <em>just</em> like you, right down to the faces he makes." </p><p>"Yes, I don't see much of Luc in there," Castiel agreed. "For which I'm grateful." </p><p>A soft snort eloquently expressed Dean's opinion of the alpha who had knocked Castiel up and then refused to take any responsibility unless Castiel agreed to mate him, which Castiel emphatically did <em>not</em> want to do. They had only been dating for a few weeks, and he had only shared his heat with Luc because he developed an allergy to his then current suppressants. The doctor adamantly refused to prescribe him anything new until he'd been through a full cycle to purge the bad stuff from his system. He had been terrified. He'd <em>never</em> had a heat completely without suppressants before, and Luc had promised to use condoms every time. </p><p>Castiel knew now that trusting Luc had been rather naïve of him, but mating the dick certainly wouldn't have made the situation <em>better</em>. The assholes who'd painted 'WHORE' and 'OMEGA SLUT' on both his car and the door of his dorm room didn't care about his reasonings though. And then there was Dean, who sat next to him and talked to him like a person, like he was just another guy. </p><p>Suddenly Castiel couldn't bear one more moment of this strange new distance that had sprung up between him and Dean in the past couple days. Before he could second guess himself, he crossed the room and wrapped his arms around Dean from behind, pressing his nose into the alpha's neck. Dean relaxed into him without hesitation, one hand coming up to card through Castiel's hair while he tilted his head to give the omega better access to his scent gland. Although he hadn't meant to initiate anything but a little cuddling and scenting for comfort, Castiel couldn't help the thrill of arousal that raced through him as he felt the alpha go pliant and trusting in his arms. Dean caught the scent of thunderstorms in the air, and his own scent quickly turned rich and spicy in response. </p><p>There was a light knock on the door, and they jumped apart a second before Jack poked his head into the room. "Uncle Michael's home, and Aunt Hannah says dinner's ready," he informed them. Still holding onto the doorknob, Jack tilted his head and wrinkled his nose. "It smells funny in here." </p><p>"Thank you, Jack," Castiel said, pointedly ignoring the second comment. "Tell your aunt we'll be down in a minute." Jack ran back downstairs, and Castiel turned as the scent of embarrassment rose in the air to see Dean flushed bright red. He reached out to hold Dean's hand, stroking lightly while Dean regained his calm. When Dean's scent had settled and he was once again composed, they headed to join Castiel's family. </p><p>~o0o~</p><p>"So, Dean, what do you do?" Michael asked as soon as they were all seated around the dinner table. </p><p>Castiel paused in cutting up Jack's chicken to glare at his brother, but before he could object to the interrogation, he felt Dean place a gentle hand on his leg under the table. </p><p>"I'm a teacher," Dean said, his tone even and his scent pleasant. </p><p>"Oh? What do you teach?"<br/> <br/>"First grade." </p><p>Michael blinked. He'd obviously been expecting Dean to name a high school subject such as Math or History. Before he could recover himself and think of a response, Jack's shrill voice broke into the adults' conversation. </p><p>"I'm gonna be in first grade next year!" </p><p>The little alpha was wiggling in his seat with excitement, and Dean immediately turned away from Michael to give Jack his full attention. "You are?" he said, somehow managing to convey without an ounce of condescension or insincerity that this was surprising and exciting news. </p><p>From the corner of his eye, Castiel saw Michael's expression darken at not only being interrupted by a child, but then being <em>ignored</em> in favor of conversing with said child, but Castiel really couldn't care. His attention was fixed on Jack's bright, happy face as the little alpha looked at Dean. </p><p>"Uh huh. Can I be in your class?" </p><p>"Dean works at a different school than the one you'll be going to, sweetie," Hannah said gently. </p><p>Jack's little shoulders slumped in disappointment. </p><p>Castiel looked from Hannah to Michael. "I wasn't aware you'd already chosen a school for him," he said carefully, struggling to keep his anger under control so Jack wouldn't scent it. </p><p>"He's going to Saint Bartholomew's just like you and I did," Michael said, his tone making it clear that the alpha had decided and the matter was settled as far as he was concerned. He switched his attention back to Dean ignoring Jack and the omegas. "That's a rather unusual career choice for an alpha, isn't it?" </p><p>Dean flushed a little, a burnt edge creeping into his scent, though probably only Castiel was attuned enough to every nuance of Dean to detect it. He controlled himself well. </p><p>Castiel's back was already up over Michael's casual assumption that he had the right to choose a school for Jack without even consulting Castiel, and he always hated it when people belittled Dean for choosing an 'omega profession'. "Dean is very good at his job," he said. "His students love him. In fact, he's the most popular teacher in the school." </p><p>Dean blushed even brighter at that, but a shyly pleased smile teased at the corners of his mouth, and his scent sweetened again. </p><p>Michael, however, looked anything but pleased. His mouth pressed into a thin, hard line, and Castiel knew what that was about. He, an omega, had dared to insert himself into a conversation between two alphas. Michael glanced at Dean, clearly expecting him to reprimand Castiel to remember his place, and when Dean did no such thing, only gazing at Castiel with gratitude and soft, warm affection in his eyes, Michael's mouth got even thinner. </p><p>"Still, I don't imagine it pays very well," he said, abandoning any pretense that this wasn't an interrogation. "How do you intend to support a mate and children on a teacher's salary?" </p><p>"I make enough," Dean said quietly, "and Cas works too. Between us, I think we can manage." </p><p>"So you expect your omega to provide financially <em>and</em> care for your children?" </p><p>"We are equal partners, Michael!" Castiel snapped, not caring even a little about his brother's antiquated 'omegas should only speak when spoken to' rule. "We will care for our children <em>together</em>, and we will manage our finances in whatever way works best for <em>us</em>. I love my job. I don't want to quit to be a stay at home omega, and Dean would never expect me to, just as I would never expect him to leave a job <em>he</em> loves for something higher paying that wouldn't make him happy." </p><p>There was a deafening silence around the table. Even Jack was staring at Castiel open-mouthed. Castiel had always been very careful not to argue with Michael in front of Jack, and he'd <em>certainly</em> never raised his voice to his brother in Jack's presence. </p><p>Finally, after several increasingly awkward seconds, Hannah cleared her throat. "Alpha?" she said demurely, lightly touching Michael's hand. "Could we please discuss something else?" She tilted her head meaningfully in Jack's direction. </p><p>"Yes, of course, Omega," Michael said.<br/> <br/>The rest of dinner was stiffly polite. They mostly talked about the weather. It was calling for at least two inches of snow overnight, which Jack was absolutely thrilled about. </p><p>"Will you help me build a snowman, Daddy?" </p><p>"Yes, of course I will," Castiel said. </p><p>"And Dean too?" </p><p>"Well, you'll have to ask Dean."<br/> <br/>"Will you build a snowman with us, Dean? Pleeeease?" </p><p>Despite the tension still hanging heavy in the air and the anger burning like a coal in his chest, Castiel managed a real smile when Jack turned on the puppy eyes and Dean promised to build a snowman with them tomorrow. </p><p>"Castiel, would you mind helping Hannah with the dishes?" Michael said, pushing back his chair. </p><p>Castiel's smile faded, and he shot a slightly panicky look at Dean, knowing that this was an excuse for Michael to talk to Dean alone without Castiel there to defend him, but Dean smiled reassuringly and leaned over to briefly nuzzle Castiel's neck, scent marking him before they went their separate ways. It was a common thing for mates and courting couples to do, and while Castiel knew that Dean was only doing it because Michael and Hannah were watching, his inner omega ignored this inconvenient bit of logic and basked in the alpha's attentions. </p><p>He suddenly realized that the itching in his claiming bite had faded after their impromptu cuddling session upstairs. <em>Oh. Ohhh.</em> He and Dean had barely touched each other in the past couple days and hadn't scented each other at all until that impulsive moment in Michael and Hannah's guest room when Castiel hadn't been able to hold back anymore. His eyes widened as he realized he'd been so busy trying to hide his feelings from Dean, so terrified that Dean would somehow read in his scent how much he wanted this to be real, that it hadn't occurred to him how neglected his inner omega would feel without any intimate physical contact with the alpha it believed had claimed it. If he wasn't more careful, he'd bring on that pining sickness even faster than he'd feared, and that would be really difficult to explain to Michael. He could ruin their whole plan if he didn't get his act together. </p><p>"You two are very sweet together," Hannah said as she handed Castiel a plate to dry. "Don't worry about Michael. He'll come around. You know he can be a bit overprotective when it comes to his baby brother." </p><p><em>Overprotective. Yes, that's one word for it,</em> Castiel thought. Aloud he said, "Saint Bart's is more than an hour away from where I live, Hannah. How is Jack supposed to go there if he's living with me?"<br/> <br/>Hannah didn't answer, her attention apparently absorbed by a stubborn stain on the bottom of the roasting pan. </p><p>"Hannah—" </p><p>"It's a good school, Castiel." </p><p>"There are other good schools. I'm… I don't know what more Michael wants from me. I have a house. I have a job. I have health insurance and a decent savings account. I have…"<em> A mate.</em> For some reason this time the lie stuck in his throat. "I have Dean. Is Michael ever going to let me have my son back?" </p><p>She whirled on him, soap suds dripping from her hands onto her gleaming kitchen floor. Her eyes flashed with an anger he had never seen there before, and her usual roses and lemon verbena scent turned cloying, like a vase of rotting, moldy flowers. "You think you're ready to be a father?" she demanded coldly. "A good father would do what was best for his child no matter how difficult it was. Jack is <em>happy</em> here. He has friends. He has a place waiting for him at Saint Bart's. But you want to take him away from the only home he's ever known, and for what? Your own selfish pride?!" </p><p>Castiel was speechless. "That's not… I… I don't…" Her accusation stung all the more because he had always thought of Hannah as his ally in all this.</p><p>Before he could muster a defense, she was already turning back to the sink and saying calmly, "Would you mind giving Jack his bath and putting him to bed? You know that when you're here he won't go down unless you tuck him in, so you might as well do the whole routine." </p><p>He might almost have believed he had imagined her outburst if not for that stagnant, rotting scent still lingering in the air. </p><p>~o0o~</p><p>Dean felt an all too familiar dread in the pit of his stomach as he followed Michael into the living room. This alpha was more polished, educated, and cultured than John Winchester, but that only made him more convinced of his own superiority, his god-given right to dominate everyone around him. Michael exuded both the hyper-alphaness that Dean had always hated, and a confidence that he was incredibly envious of. It didn't help that he was a guest in the other alpha's territory. </p><p>A huge Christmas tree glowed with lights in one corner of the living room, and a stocking with <em>JACK</em> embroidered on it hung from the mantel above the empty fireplace, but those were the Novaks' only decorations for the holidays. </p><p>"You wanna see the ormanent I made in playgroup?" asked Jack who had trailed after the two adult alphas like a puppy. </p><p>"Sure," Dean started to say, but Michael cut in brusquely, "Jack, go play in your room until bedtime. I need to speak with Dean privately." </p><p>Jack looked disappointed but didn't argue. Dean had already noticed that the little boy regarded his uncle with a respect bordering on awe, but none of the adoration he showed for Cas. </p><p>As Jack's footsteps receded up the stairs, Michael went over to the carved rosewood liquor cabinet. "What's your poison?"<br/> <br/>"Oh, I, um… I don't drink," Dean lied impulsively. He had a feeling he should keep all his brain cells in working order around Michael.<br/> <br/>Michael gave him a funny look, and for a moment Dean thought he was going to insist that Dean drink with him, or ask if he was a recovering alcoholic, but then he shrugged, took a glass and an expensive looking bottle of scotch from the cabinet, and poured himself a double. "Have a seat," he said, gesturing to the couch. He himself sat in an armchair that had been strategically placed to command the entire room with all of the other furniture purposefully angled towards it. </p><p>Dean took the offered seat, trying his best not to show how small and cowed, and frankly inferior, he felt in the other alpha's presence. Judging by the gleam in Michael's eyes, he failed miserably. </p><p>"You must understand, Dean," Michael said, "Castiel isn't just my little brother. He's like a son to me too. I raised him after our parents died. Did he tell you that?" </p><p>"Yeah, he's told me." </p><p>"So you understand why I can't give him into the care of just any alpha. Especially after the debacle with Jack's biological father proved that he doesn't have the best taste when it comes to alphas." </p><p>Dean bristled both at being compared to that asshole Luc, <em>and</em> at the implication that Cas was Michael's property to keep or give away, but he held his temper in check. Michael was baiting him, and he wouldn't rise to it. "Cas was young when he got pregnant with Jack. He's matured a lot since then, and he's learned from his mistakes."</p><p>Michael made a noncommittal humming sound and sipped his drink. "And you're really willing to take another alpha's child into your home? Raise him as your own?" </p><p>"I'm willing to raise <em>Cas'</em> child as my own because I love Cas and I want him to be happy." The truth of the words left a bitter taste in Dean's mouth. </p><p>"He can have more children. <em>Your</em> children." Michael cocked his head. "Can't he? There's no reason a healthy young alpha like yourself wouldn't be able to give him as many babies as his heart desires. I mean, it's obvious that <em>he's</em> fertile. The proof of that is upstairs right now." </p><p>Dean felt his face flush with a combination of anger and embarrassment. "Of course we'll have more kids if he wants to," he said, barely restraining himself from growling the words. "But they won't be Jack. You can't just replace one child with another." <em>You can't just pretend one of your children doesn't exist.</em> </p><p>Michael laughed, a soft, sarcastic, pitying sound. "Please, Dean. Don't pretend you care about Jack. This is about Castiel. Anyone can see he's got your knot in his pocket. He probably told you he wouldn't go through with the mating unless you adopt Jack. Am I right?" </p><p>That caught Dean completely off guard, and it took him a moment too long to respond. Michael took his stunned silence as proof that he had indeed hit upon the truth. </p><p>The alpha shook his head, regarding Dean with a mixture of pity and disgust. "I don't blame <em>you</em>. Castiel has always been good at getting his own way. Our parents spoiled him since he was the baby of the family, and I didn't do much better I suppose. I was young and immature myself when I took custody of him. I was far more concerned with wanting him to <em>like</em> me than with disciplining him as he needed, and you…" That soft, condescending laugh again. "Well, no offense, Dean, but it's obvious you don't have much alpha in you at the best of times, let alone when you're too infatuated to see straight." </p><p>Those words, the look, that laugh, and the smoky alpha scent mingled with the heady aroma of the whiskey — it was all way too reminiscent of John. <em>It isn't going to work,</em> Dean thought as buzzing, a distant swarm of bees, filled his ears. <em>I'm not the right kind of alpha, and now he thinks Cas can't even be trusted to pick his own mate. I've just made everything worse.</em> He felt a squeezing in his chest, an iron band tightening around his lungs, and he realized he was on the verge of a panic attack. He had to get out of there. He couldn't start hyperventilating in front of Michael. That would conclusively prove he was a weak, pathetic excuse for an alpha, and a man completely unworthy of Cas. </p><p>He stood so abruptly that he banged his shin of the corner of the coffee table. "I, uh… it… it's been a long day," he stammered. "I think I'm gonna go to bed." He turned and fled before Michael could reply. </p><p>~o0o~</p><p>Castiel sat on the closed lid of the toilet while Jack splashed happily around the tub with his bath toys. Usually he treasured every opportunity to spend time with his son, to watch him play and marvel at how boundless his imagination was, and he was trying to enjoy it tonight too, but Hannah's words kept chasing themselves around and around inside his head. </p><p>
  <em>… take him away from the only home he's ever known… Jack is happy here… Your own selfish pride…</em>
</p><p><em>Is she right? Am I being selfish, trying to take him away from all this?</em> Even if he moved to a neighborhood closer to Saint Bart's, he couldn't afford their tuition fees. He was saving up to buy a house of his own, but it would never be this big, and he was sure that whatever Jack found waiting under the Christmas tree tomorrow from Michael and Hannah would far outshine the simple little paint set that Castiel had bought for him.</p><p>"Daddy!" Jack's insistent tone pulled Castiel out of his thoughts and let him know that Jack had been trying to get his attention for several seconds. He mentally kicked himself for letting any precious moments with his son slip away from him. He could worry about everything else later. He shoved it all in a box at the back of his mind and turned his attention back to Jack. </p><p>"I'm sorry, baby. I was distracted. What did you need?" </p><p>Jack held out his little rubber clown fish toy. "You be Nemo, and I'll be Dory." </p><p>Castiel smiled and obligingly took the toy, and for the next twenty minutes Nemo and Dory adventured around the bathtub-ocean, escaping sharks and searching for treasure. </p><p>"Jack," Castiel said as he was drying the little boy off and wrapping him in his dinosaur bathrobe, "you know how we've talked about you maybe coming to live at my house someday? Permanently, I mean, not just for a weekend?" </p><p>Jack's eyes immediately lit up. "Yeah! Can I soon?" </p><p>He chose his words carefully, not wanting to make promises he wasn't sure he could keep. "I'm working on it, but I want to know… Are you sure you really want to? It would mean a lot of changes. You'll be farther away from all your friends." Castiel paused a moment to gather himself. "If you would rather stay here with Uncle Michael and Aunt Hannah, that would be okay. I just want you to be happy." </p><p>Jack looked confused and a little worried. "But, Dad, I wanna live with you," he said, a faint warning tremor in his voice. "And… and Dean too, right? Cause he's your alpha?" </p><p>Castiel's heart twisted with such a strange mix of emotions that he couldn't even put a name to most of them. "Y-yes. He's my alpha." <em>Even if he doesn't know it, he's the only alpha I would ever allow to lay claim to me. I am and always will be his and his alone.</em> "Do you like Dean?" </p><p>Jack nodded enthusiastically. "Uh huh. He smells nice. Kinda like pancakes!" </p><p>Castiel couldn't help but laugh at this description of Dean's maple scent. "Yeah, he does smell kind of like pancakes." He swung Jack up into his arms and carried him down the hall to his bedroom. He was really getting too big to carry, but it was only a short distance, and Castiel wanted to soak up every second of his baby being little and cuddly. All too soon he would turn into a sullen teenager who could barely tolerate a hug. </p><p>Jack danced around in his Olaf pajamas, and for his bedtime story he chose a book about a boy who built a snowman that came to life and played with him. Castiel sensed a theme here, and sure enough, even as Jack was nodding off, he sleepily murmured, "You're gonna build a snowman with me tomorrow, right, Daddy?" The last two words got swallowed up in an enormous yawn. </p><p>"Of course, baby," Castiel said again, tucking the blankets snugly around his son. </p><p>"An' Dean too?" </p><p>"And Dean too. Sleep now, love. You know Santa won't come unless you're asleep." </p><p>Jack closed his eyes and burrowed down into his soft flannel sheets. Castiel watched the rise and fall of his shoulders starting to slow, and sat on the edge of the bed, stroking his son's hair and wondering at how much he loved this person who wouldn't exist if not for some bad suppressants and a stupid, impulsive decision made by a scared, nineteen-year-old omega. </p><p>~o0o~ </p><p>Cas wasn't in their room, so Dean assumed he was either still helping Hannah in the kitchen or tucking Jack in. He sat on the edge of the bed and focused on slowing his breathing and grounding himself, but his usual tricks — counting backwards from one-hundred, listing the things he could see, smell, feel, and hear — weren't working. He pushed himself to his feet, opened the closet, and pulled out Cas' shirt for tomorrow. It was clean and smelled mostly of laundry soap, but there was enough of Cas' scent still lingering in the fibers. </p><p>He wasn't sure how long he stood there with the crisp, pale blue button down getting wrinkled as he crushed it to his nose. He breathed in deeply, seeking out every trace of that fresh rain and green leaf scent. Gradually his heart rate slowed, the invisible weight on his chest eased up, and the buzzing in his head receded. He took a few more deep sniffs of the shirt, then, feeling suddenly ashamed of himself, shook it out and hung it back up, doing his best to smooth out the wrinkles. He prayed that Cas wouldn't notice. </p><p>Still feeling off balance, Dean changed into his pajamas and got into the big bed. It felt even bigger with just him in it. He tapped his phone screen to check the time and discovered that it was barely eight. Shit. Well, there was no way he was going back downstairs now. He wished he'd brought a book with him, and there was no TV in the room to turn on for a distraction. He picked up his phone and scrolled through his contacts in search of someone he could talk to about this screwed up situation. He didn't have to go far, finding exactly what he needed in the B's. </p><p>Benny answered after the second ring. "Hey, cher. What's up? You and Cas want a third for some Christmas Eve fun?" </p><p>Dean chuckled, feeling some of the tension finally melt out of his neck and shoulders as soon as he heard Benny's deep, calm voice. In another life, one where he had never met Cas, he could probably have been quite content to date Benny and let the big, handsome alpha fuck him into the mattress a few times a week. Maybe they would even have bought a little house together and adopted a couple of kids. Alphas couldn't form mating bonds with other alphas, but as of a few years ago, they could get legally married the same as betas. Except he <em>had</em> met Cas, and now there was no one else he could envision that kind of future with even if it was a dream that would never come true. </p><p>"No," he said in answer to Benny's question. "We're, um… we're actually spending the night at Cas' brother's house."</p><p>There was a beat of silence, Benny clearly waiting for Dean to elaborate. When he didn't, Benny said, "Now I can tell that there's more to this story, brotha. If you want my help with something, I'm gonna need a little more to go on." </p><p>Dean sighed and rubbed a hand over his face, pushing his glasses up his forehead, then letting them slip back down onto his nose. "Shit, Benny, I did a really stupid thing." </p><p>He told Benny everything, from their plan to convince Cas' family that they were courting, and the "fake" claiming bite, to Michael's attitude towards Dean and Dean's growing suspicion that Michael had no intention of ever giving back custody no matter what Cas did. The only part he left out were his very real feelings for Cas. Benny had scened with them a few times, and he was a perceptive man, so he had likely noticed Dean's utter devotion to his Dom. While Dean obviously enjoyed watching Benny fuck Cas, he had never allowed anyone other than Cas to touch him during a scene, and Benny had tactfully never mentioned it. </p><p>After Dean finished explaining, he concentrated on taking calming breaths while Benny turned it all over in his head. Benny never spoke without thinking, and Dean could be patient waiting for his advice. "Well, you certainly got yourself a pickle there, cher," Benny said finally. "Have you considered talking to Sam? Doesn't he specialize in this kind of thing?" </p><p>"Cas doesn't want to take Michael to court and put Jack in the middle of a big family feud." </p><p>Benny sighed, sending a puff of static through the phone. "Yeah, I hear that. Lord knows I was glad Andrea and me didn't have any kids when we split." </p><p>"And if he <em>does</em> take him to court now, what if someone finds out we lied about being together? That's not gonna help Cas' case any." Dean leaned his head back into the fluffy pillows and closed his eyes while focusing on his breathing, once again trying to stave off another panic attack. </p><p>He knew he had only himself to blame for the current situation. Cas had been planning to admit his lie, but noooo, Dean just had to go and suggest they play it through! He should have known he wasn't the kind of alpha that Michael would approve of. He was barely an alpha at all. <em>Can't even pop a knot outside of rut unless I have something up my ass…</em></p><p>"Dean? You still with me, cher?" </p><p>"Yeah, I"m…" He cleared his throat and blinked back tears of shame and frustration. "I'm here." </p><p>At that moment, the door opened and Cas came in. He took one look at Dean, and Dean immediately knew that there would be no point in claiming to be fine. <em>How</em> did the omega do that? Dean had always been good at bullshitting. He had to learn how at a young age. It came with the territory when you had a dad like John Winchester, no mom, and a little brother to take care of. <em>"Of course Dad'll be home soon, Sammy. Sure you can have money for the school field trip. No, we've got plenty left for groceries."</em> But Cas… Somehow those blue eyes saw right through Dean, past all the bullshit, past all his walls, down into the depths of his soul. </p><p>"I gotta go, Benny." </p><p>"Okay, cher," Benny said easily. "You know you can always call me if you need to talk." </p><p>"I know. Thanks, Benny. Merry Christmas."<br/> <br/>"Merry Christmas, darlin'. Give Cas my best." </p><p>"Will do." </p><p>"What's wrong?" Cas asked as soon as Dean hung up. "What did Michael say to you?"<br/> <br/>Dean shook his head. "You don't want to know." </p><p>"Yes, I do." Cas' tone brooked no argument, and this was so not the time for Dean to get a boner, but his traitorous dick didn't care. Fuck, he had his wires crossed so bad. Cas closed the door with a soft click, kicked off his shoes, and climbed onto the bed. "Dean, talk to me. Please. What happened?" He reached out to cup Dean's cheek, ducking his head to look right into Dean's eyes. The gentle look and tender, affectionate touch made the tears well up again.</p><p>"He's not going for it, Cas." </p><p>Cas paled, his eyes widening. "He doesn't believe us?"<br/> <br/>"Oh, no. No, he believes us. He just doesn't think <em>I'm</em>…" Dean hiccupped and continued in a whisper, "the kind of alpha you need." </p><p>Cas' expression hardened. "You mean he thinks you allow me too much independence." </p><p>"Pretty much. Cas… I don't think he has any plans to give you custody of Jack whether you're mated or not. He's just stalling." </p><p>Abruptly all the fight went out of Cas, and he dropped his head wearily onto Dean's shoulder. "Yes, I got the same impression from my conversation with Hannah," he said, a little muffled. </p><p>"Hannah too?" Dean was surprised, but he pushed it aside to wrap his arms around Cas and card his fingers through the omega's soft hair. "Well… we could talk to Sam. I know you wanted to avoid going that route, but if it's your only option…" </p><p>Cas nodded, his stubble rubbing distractingly against Dean's neck. "I know. Let's just… get through tomorrow and then we'll decide on the next step." </p><p>"Okay. It's up to you."<br/> <br/>"I'm sorry I dragged you into this." </p><p>Dean snorted. "Pretty sure it was my idea, Cas." </p><p>Cas conceded the point with an amused huff that breezed across Dean's scent gland and made him shiver, but if Cas had noticed the arousal in Dean's scent, he didn't act on it, so Dean figured he wasn't in the mood. </p><p>Cas gently disentangled himself from Dean and began to undress, folding his clothes neatly before returning them to his suitcase even though they would just get dumped in the laundry as soon as he got home. Dean averted his eyes from the sight of Cas' toned back muscles and the dark feathers inked on his biceps moving hypnotically as he stripped off his undershirt. If he got any more worked up, sharing a bed with Cas tonight really <em>would</em> be awkward. </p><p>Cas stripped down to his boxers and climbed into his side of the bed, clicking off the lamp on his nightstand. Great. Of all the times for him to forego pajamas. Dean decided that commenting on it, and therefore drawing attention to his not so little problem, would only make things worse. He took off his glasses, put them safely on the nightstand, and turned off the second light. </p><p>There were a few seconds of jostling while they got comfortable under the covers and then a heavy silence. There was no denying it. This was weird, and it wasn't difficult to guess why. They had never shared a bed without having sex first, which meant that by the time they reached the sleeping portion of the evening, Dean was usually a happy puddle of endorphins and Cas was busy aftercaring the shit out of him. Since Dean was a very tactile person, his aftercare needs involved a <em>lot</em> of cuddling. Lying next to Cas in bed without touching him just felt… wrong. </p><p>"Dean?" Cas' voice came out of the darkness, sounding much closer than Dean had expected. In the dark room his mind had turned the few inches between them into a gaping chasm. "Can you…" </p><p>When he didn't finish the question, Dean pushed up on his elbows and squinted at the pale blur of Cas' face. "What?" </p><p>"The claiming bite," Cas said quietly, and he sounded almost embarrassed. </p><p>"What about it? Does it hurt?" Could it be infected? Dean had been very careful not to break the skin since that would turn it from a claiming bit into a mating bite. </p><p>"No. Not hurt exactly. It just… itches. I think it's because we… well, if we were really planning to mate, you would be all over me at this stage, licking the bite and scent marking it at every opportunity. My body is just a little confused right now I guess." </p><p>"You want me to lick it?" Dean wanted to. God did he want permission to so badly, but his boner hadn't completely gone away yet, and being pressed against Cas, licking his damn scent gland right where the claiming bite was, <em>Dean's</em> claiming bite… Well, those definitely weren't boner killing thoughts. In fact, his dick was waking up again just when he'd almost convinced it that it wasn't getting any action tonight. </p><p>"No," Cas said quickly. "I think just scenting you will be enough." </p><p>"Oh." Dean honestly wasn't sure if the answer relieved or disappointed him. </p><p>
  <em>('Disappointed! Definitely disappointed!' </em>
</p><p>
  <em>'Shut up, dick. No one asked you.')</em>
</p><p>"Okay, um…" Dean turned on his side, facing away from Cas, and scooted back until he was in the middle of the bed, perfectly positioned for Cas to spoon him from behind. "How's this?" </p><p>Instead of answering with words, Cas slotted himself into place behind Dean. He tucked one arm under Dean's head and draped the other over his waist, tactfully avoiding the bulge in his sleep pants. "Merry Christmas, Dean," he murmured into the nape of Dean's neck. </p><p>Dean smiled. "Merry Christmas, Cas." </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>
  <strong>SPOILERS: </strong>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>1) <strong>Dubious consent:</strong> Cas remembers how he got pregnant with Jack. He spent his heat with an alpha he had been dating for only a few weeks. The alpha promised beforehand to use condoms, but then failed to do so. It is implied that at the time Cas was too out of it because of his heat to give informed consent to having sex without a condom. </p><p>2) <strong>Offensive Language:</strong> Cas remembers during his pregnancy having his car and his dorm room tagged with offensive slurs such as "whore" and "slut". </p><p>3) <strong>Panic Attack and Self Hating/Toxic Thoughts:</strong> A conversation with Michael sends Dean into a panic attack. While struggling to calm himself, he has toxic thoughts such as that preferring the role of bottom during sex makes him less alpha/masculine. This is completely untrue. There is nothing un-masculine about enjoying anal penetration, but because Dean does not share these thoughts with Cas or anyone else, they are never explicitly contradicted in the narrative. </p><p>4)<strong> Mentions of Dean/Cas/Others:</strong> There is a mention of Dean and Cas sometimes having threesomes with Benny. There will be no explicit threesome scenes and no explicit sex scene with Dean/Benny or Cas/Benny in this story. </p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I sincerely apologize for the long wait. A huge thank you to MandalaRose for being so patient with me. Thank yous are also in order for my beta reader, <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/stitchingirl/pseuds/stitchingirl">stitchingirl</a>, and my editor, EyumdaRelmera, for making sure Jack did not receive a new pain set for Christmas. 😂</p><p><strong>Warnings:</strong> This chapter contains a brief reference to child abuse. Go down to the end notes if you need spoilers before you feel comfortable reading. </p><p> </p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was a good thing they had gone to bed early because it was still mostly dark outside when they were woken by an excited five-year-old jumping on their bed and yelling at the top of his little lungs, "It's Christmas! It's Christmas! Wake up, Daddy! It's Christmas and there's <em>so</em> much <em>snow</em>! We can build the most humongoustest snowman!"<br/> <br/>"Jack, lower your voice," Cas chided. "You'll wake Dean." </p><p>"Too late," Dean groaned into his pillow. </p><p>"Can I open my presents now, Daddy?" Jack asked, thankfully a <em>little</em> more quietly though the little alpha continued his excited jumping. "Can I, can I, canIcanIcanIcan—"</p><p>"Yes," Cas interrupted hastily. "Just give Daddy one minute to put on some clothes." </p><p>Dean felt the blankets shift and settle as Cas got out of bed. He immediately missed the omega's warmth against his back. That loss combined with Jack's incessant bouncing made it highly unlikely that he was getting back to sleep any time soon, so he sat up too, fumbling for his glasses on the top of the nightstand. </p><p>"You don't have to get up yet, Dean," Cas said. He was pulling on the t-shirt and sweatpants he had neglected to wear to bed last night. His hair was a wild mess like it always was in the mornings, and his jaw looked deliciously scruffy. </p><p>Dean gave a dismissive wave. "I'm awake anyway. I can make coffee while you supervise the little monster." </p><p>Jack giggled. "Like in Monsters Inc. I'm the Amobibable Snowman." He made his little hands into claws and gave an adorable imitation of an alpha growl. </p><p>His jumping around had finally taken him a little too close to the edge of the bed, and both Dean and Cas dove to catch him. Dean managed to grab Jack around the waist before he tipped over, but Jack was too excited to notice the close call and immediately started wriggling out of Dean's arms and onto the floor. The little alpha danced out of the room, singing happily to himself, "Presents, presents, Christmas presents," while Dean was still trying to calm his racing heart. Kids wake you up faster than coffee for sure. </p><p>He felt a gentle hand on his cheek and looked up into blue eyes. "Are you okay?" Cas asked. </p><p>"Me?! He's the one who just—" Dean broke off with a chuckle and leaned his head into Cas' hand while still breathing deeply. "I'll never get used to the way kids can do that, almost break their little necks and then run off to play like nothing happened."</p><p>"You don't remember thinking you could fly when you were his age?" Cas said with a soft smile. </p><p>"Oh, I remember it. Hell, I jumped off the roof of the shed when I was eight and barely got a scratch. Didn't understand why my dad was so mad about it. Now I get it." </p><p>"Well, on Jack's behalf and my own, thank you for saving him." </p><p>Dean shook his head, feeling a blush warm his cheeks at the sincere gratitude in Cas' voice. "It's not like I pulled him out of a burning building." </p><p>Cas just shook his head right back and leaned down to capture Dean's lips in a soft, warm kiss. Dean hummed happily, his hands reaching out of their own volition to caress Cas' hips, drawing the omega closer. Cas planted one knee on the edge of the bed for balance and tipped Dean's head back so he could plunder the alpha's mouth properly. </p><p>"Daaaad!"</p><p>They broke apart, both breathless and laughing. "I'm coming, Jack," Cas called. </p><p>"Not yet you're not," Dean murmured only loud enough for Cas to hear, "but you will be later. I've got a special present for you when we get home." </p><p>Cas arched an eyebrow. "Is that so? Well, it just so happens that I have one for you as well." He stroked Dean's cheek with the back of his hand, then lightly chucked him under the chin with a wink. </p><p>Dean grinned. "Then I guess we both have something to look forward to. Now go open presents with your son." He gave Cas a playful swat on the ass as the omega stood up and turned away which earned him a laugh and a teasing shake of said ass right before it disappeared out the door. </p><p>Dean sat there a moment longer, thinking about the package currently hidden in his suitcase. He had already resigned himself that it wouldn't be there in time when the FedEx truck pulled up just as he was putting their bags in the car yesterday. It was probably sacrilegious to count that as a Christmas miracle, especially considering what the package contained (and the use to which Dean intended to put it), but he was very relieved that it wouldn't be sitting on his front steps for two days, at risk of water damage and thieves. </p><p>It hadn't been cheap, but it had been worth every penny. Cas was going to love it! As he was thinking about <em>exactly</em> how much Cas was going to love it, Dean became aware that his dick was starting to tent the front of his pajama pants. Again. He sighed and hurriedly closed the bedroom door before changing into jeans for the day, determinedly thinking of Sam wearing nothing but a bikini made of kale until his boner went limp in disgust. </p><p>~o0o~</p><p>Hannah was awake and already making coffee, which saved Dean from the awkwardness of rummaging through a stranger's kitchen cabinets. His stomach did a little flip as he remembered the events of last night and wondered how much Michael had told her about their conversation, but she greeted him with a pleasant smile and a "Merry Christmas". </p><p>"Merry Christmas, Hannah. Jack woke you up too, huh?" </p><p>"It's amazing how much noise one small child can make, isn't it? But this is probably nothing compared to what you deal with at work every day. How many children are in your class?" </p><p>"Between fifteen and twenty depending on the year. This year I have eighteen." </p><p>"Eighteen?!" she exclaimed. "They must run you ragged." </p><p>"Well, I have an assistant. And I don't usually have to deal with them until after I've had plenty of coffee."</p><p>She laughed and began taking mugs out of the cabinet as the coffee maker beeped. "I guess it's good practice for when you and Castiel start having kids of your own. Do you want a big family?" </p><p>Dean faltered for a moment but recovered quickly. "We're gonna take it one kid at a time, see how we feel," he improvised, and then, because it seemed like a good opportunity to test the waters, he added, "We'll probably wait until Jack is settled in with us before having another one. We don't want to overwhelm him with too many changes at once." </p><p>Hannah paled, her floral scent turning rotten and cloying for a moment. She regained control of herself almost immediately, but she avoided his eyes, busying herself pouring the coffee. "Of course," she said, her voice a little too high and tremulous. "That makes sense." </p><p>He wasn't surprised that she didn't argue with him. She had been raised to always defer to alphas, even not very intimidating ones like him. An idle thought passed his mind, and he started to wonder how happy she really was in her marriage. Michael didn't seem like a very attentive mate. In fact, he seemed to take her for granted just like every other 'real alpha', assuming that she would always be there to cook his meals, keep his house tidy, and take care of his children…</p><p>Except there weren't any other children. There was only Jack. </p><p>Michael's words from last night came back to Dean. <em>There's no reason a healthy young alpha like yourself wouldn't be able to give him as many babies as his heart desires.</em> At the time he'd been too angry and panicked to consider that the subtle accusation might be a projection of Michael's own inadequacies. Now, in the cold, calm light of dawn, he wondered. Was this about more than Michael's need to control every aspect of Cas' life? Was Jack his only chance to have a child? </p><p>But… no, that didn't make any sense. They could always adopt or use a donor. They had the money. Then he remembered what else Michael had said. <em>You're really willing to take another alpha's child into your home? Raise him as your own? </em></p><p>Yes, to an alpha like Michael that would be the ultimate insult, a constant reminder of his failings. Raising Cas' child though? Well, that was his duty as the head of the family, just as it had been his duty to raise Cas after their parents had died. That soothed his ego. He wasn't a failure in that scenario. He was the family hero, a savior of abandoned omegas and orphaned children. </p><p>"How do you take your coffee?" Hannah asked, breaking into his thoughts. Her voice was steady and her scent even again.<br/> <br/>"Oh, um… nothing in it. Black." </p><p>"Oh. Well, here you go then." She handed him two mugs, one with cream the way Cas liked it. </p><p>The living room was a scene of carnage, scraps of bright red wrapping paper strewn everywhere like blood spatter, and in the center of it all Jack sat surrounded by new toys still in their packaging. There was a GI Joe action figure, a Lego set with a picture of a battleship on the box, a remote control fighter plane, and the crowning glory, a motorized tricycle designed to look like a Harley Davidson. More goodies spilled out of his stocking which had been taken down from the mantle — matchbox cars, little green army men, and those pellets that you soaked in water and they turned into dinosaur shaped sponges.</p><p>Jack, however, did not look as happy as he had when he was jumping on the bed. He looked like he was struggling to hide his disappointment. It was a strangely grown-up expression, and it looked out of place on his soft, round little face. Dean looked around at the presents, all of them obviously chosen with an eye towards what would be considered appropriate for an alpha child, and his heart went out to the little boy. </p><p>"Look, sweetheart," Cas said gently. "There's one more." He held out a flat, square package, much smaller than the others, wrapped in light blue paper with silver snowflakes on it. Dean knew what it was because he had watched Cas wrap it at their kitchen table last week. </p><p>Jack took it and tore into the paper, obviously trying not to get his hopes up, but his mouth fell open and his blue eyes widened when he saw the paint set. "Wow!" he breathed, a smile lighting up his face. </p><p>"I guess a little elf must have told Santa how much you love painting," Cas said, ruffling his son's hair. </p><p>"Can I make something with 'em now?" Jack asked. </p><p>"Don't you want to unpack your other toys?" Hannah said. Dean started slightly. He had been so absorbed in watching Cas and Jack that he had forgotten she was in the room. </p><p>Jack looked around at the action figures and Legos and the bike. "I guess," he said without much enthusiasm. "Can't we go build a snowman now?" </p><p>"You're still in your pajamas, buddy," Dean pointed out. "How about you clean up this wrapping paper and eat a bowl of cereal or something while your dad drinks his coffee, and then we can get bundled up and play in the snow." He handed Cas the coffee with the cream in it, and sat down next to him on the couch.</p><p>"Okay!" Jack said agreeably, and he began scrambling around the room, scooping up handfuls of paper and dropping them into the trash bag left in the corner for just this purpose. </p><p>"How did you do that?" Cas whispered, leaning into Dean's side.<br/> <br/>"Teacher voice," Dean whispered back. He automatically wrapped an arm around Cas' shoulders like he always did when they were cuddling on the couch at home. "I, uh… hope I wasn't out of line."</p><p>"No, of course not," Cas said, tucking himself more comfortably into the curve of Dean's arm and laying his head on Dean's shoulder. "If he's going to live with us, he needs to respect your authority." </p><p>Dean was peripherally aware of Hannah watching them from the doorway, but that had nothing to do with why he kissed Cas' forehead. He wished he could murmur an <em>I love you</em> into Cas' hair too. He could probably get away with it, claim it was just part of the act, but… he would know the truth even if Cas didn't, and he wasn't sure his heart could come back from that. </p><p>~o0o~</p><p>"We gotta sing the snowman song," Jack said as they started rolling the first big ball for the snowman's base. </p><p>"What's the snowman song?" Dean asked. </p><p>Cas winked at him over Jack's head and sang in his rough baritone, "Do you wanna build a snowman?"</p><p>"C'mon, let's go and play!" Jack joined in, shouting the words more than singing them.</p><p>"Oh, no," Dean groaned. "Not <em>that</em> snowman song. Now it's gonna be stuck in my head all day."</p><p>"You don't like Frozen?" Jack asked meekly. "Is that 'cus it's a princess movie? Uncle Michael says princess movies are for omegas, but Aunt Hannah says it's okay if I like them for now 'cus I'm still little." </p><p>Dean stopped cold, staring at Jack. "Actually, I, um… I like Moana better," he said, "but Frozen is good too." </p><p>"I love Moana!" Jack crowed excitedly. </p><p>While they built their snowman, they compared notes on their favorite princess movies with Cas chiming in occasionally though he was far less of a Disney fan than Dean and Jack. When the snowman was complete, they had a snowball fight, Dean and Jack against Cas, which might have seemed unfair if Cas hadn't been such a deadly shot. Of course he targeted Dean more than Jack (although he was careful not to hit Dean in the face and risk damaging his glasses), and by the time Hannah came to the door to tell them there was hot cocoa and grilled cheese sandwiches waiting, Dean was thoroughly soaked and getting cold. It was strangely exhilarating. He couldn't remember the last time he had played in the snow like this, although he figured it was probably back when he and Sammy were kids. </p><p>As they tromped inside, they noticed that it had started snowing again, slowly obscuring the footprints they had left all over the yard. </p><p>Michael was finally up and about, dressed casually in jeans and a dark blue sweater since he wasn't going into the office. Dean's stomach did another flip as he came face to face with the alpha for the first time since their conversation the previous night, but he managed to keep the fear out of his scent and, apart from a slight sneer, Michael seemed willing to pretend nothing had happened. </p><p>"They won't plow the roads until the snow stops," Michael said as they all dug into their food, "and since we're a bit out of the way here, we're often the last to get dug out. You're welcome to stay another night if need be."</p><p>"I can do a load of laundry for you if you don't have enough clothes," Hannah offered. </p><p>Dean exchanged a look with Cas. The last thing either of them wanted to do was stay in this house longer than they absolutely had to, but there was no way Baby could handle the roads in their current condition.</p><p>"Thank you," Cas said for both of them. "That's very kind. If we're not plowed out before dark, we'll take you up on that." </p><p>And if Dean felt a little bit selfishly glad that they would have to keep up their couple act for another day, well, no one had to know but him.  </p><p>~o0o~</p><p>The snow showed no sign of slowing as the day went on. Instead, it fell thicker and faster, and the temperature dipped so low that both Cas and Hannah agreed that even bundled up, it was no longer safe for Jack to play outside. Instead, Cas spread newspapers on the dining room table, and Hannah got some blank printer paper and one of Michael's old shirts to serve as a smock so Jack could try out his new paints. The little alpha spent the next several hours happily creating masterpiece after masterpiece, his other new toys sitting neglected, still in their packaging. Even when Hannah said he could ride his new tricycle in the house if he wanted, he merely shook his head distractedly and said, "No, thank you", not even looking up from his painting. </p><p>Cas sat with Jack, not bothering him with questions about what he was painting, serenely watching as though he'd been granted a rare opportunity to see a famous artist at work on the condition that he remain perfectly quiet and not disturb the master. </p><p>Dean sat with them too, partly because he had nothing else to do, partly (though he was loath to admit it to himself) because he didn't want to get cornered by Michael again, but mostly it was because Cas and Jack together was the most mesmerizing thing he'd ever seen. They had the same adorable little frown when they were concentrating, the same unconscious habit of biting their lower lip, and the same piercing blue eyes that seemed to see right through the surface of things (and him) to the true essence beneath. </p><p>Dean realized with only mild surprise that he loved them both equally. He might barely know Jack, but he loved the kid with the same fierce, protective love he felt for his students and for Sammy. He loved him like he imagined he would love his own son if he ever had one. </p><p>Not wanting to disturb the peace of the moment, Dean stood up quietly and snuck upstairs to use the restroom. On his way back downstairs, he passed the partially open door of what he presumed to be Michael and Hannah's bedroom based on the way both their scents leaked out of the room more thickly than anywhere else in the house. He heard Michael's voice, and some instinct made him pause and listen. </p><p>"… boy will never learn to be a proper alpha with everyone coddling him." The alpha sounded just as disgusted as he had last night when he accused Dean of letting Cas keep Dean's knot in his pocket. </p><p>"He's only five," came Hannah's soft, placating voice. "He'll grow out of it once he starts school." </p><p>"Not with that Dean hanging around he won't. Alphas like that are <em>exactly</em> the kind of bad influence a boy like Jack doesn't need." </p><p>Dean suddenly felt sick. He didn't want to hear any more, but he couldn't go downstairs now. Cas would pick up on the distress in his scent, and Jack might too. They were having such a good day. He wouldn't ruin it for them. He <em>couldn't</em> ruin it for them. Instead he tiptoed back to the bathroom and locked the door. </p><p>He sat on the lid of the toilet, staring at the blue and white pattern of the floor tiles and counting how many times it repeated. It was easier this time to calm his breathing, easier to keep the shame and self-doubt at bay. All he had to do was focus on the anger boiling up in his gut, the same righteous anger he'd felt last year when he had noticed finger shaped bruises on the neck of a little girl in his class. </p><p>This wasn't just about helping Cas out anymore, and it definitely wasn't about indulging his selfish fantasies of claiming Cas as his mate. They had to get Jack out of this house and away from Michael's toxic influence before the 'proper' alpha broke the sweet, innocent boy the same way John Winchester had tried to break Dean.   </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>See that happy ending tag? See it? Good. So don't hate me too much in the meantime.   </p><p> </p><p><strong>SPOILERS:</strong> </p><p>There is a brief mention of Dean having seen bruises on a child in his class. It is not discussed in detail. </p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>A belated happy birthday to my dear MandalaRose! I hope this chapter is a good present. 🎂</p><p>And a quick note from my editor.</p><p><strong>Eyum:</strong> I'm hoping you all are enjoying this Christmas world TCU has been writing for you! *glances at her calendar* I want to apologize to everyone for the long waits in between updates. It has taken far longer than the original planned timeline to release this. I am completely to blame for this. *hangs head* Due to some medical issues compounded by the quarantine, I had to pause editing for everyone because I wasn't able to give works their due, and TCU patiently waited for me to get better to tackle this project. This chapter was a lot of fun to 'beat into submission' (yes, I saw that!), so get comfy and enjoy!</p><p><strong>TCU again:</strong> Hi. I'd like to add that Eyum offers me her professional editing services for <em>free</em>. She does this for love, just like all of us here in the fanfic community, and she is my friend first, my editor second, so no getting mad at her for needing a mental health break, got it? *growls protectively*</p><p><strong>Warning:</strong> NSFW 😉</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jack needed another bath to get all of the paint off of him. Fortunately he liked baths and didn't put up a fuss. Castiel tossed the magic dinosaur pellets into the water, and Jack watched with fascination as they expanded while barely noticing the vigorous scrubbing his father was giving him with the washcloth. </p><p>"Did you have a good Christmas?" Castiel asked as he tucked a clean, pajama-clad little alpha into bed. </p><p>"Uh huh." Jack yawned hugely, and Castiel had to fight the urge to do the same. "Daddy?" </p><p>"Yes, baby?" </p><p>"Dean likes princess movies and he's a growed up alpha. Does that mean it's okay if I like 'em too? Even when I'm all growed up?" </p><p>Castiel kept a tight rein on his emotions, making sure that none of the anger, frustration, or sadness he was feeling leaked into his scent. He touched his son's soft, smooth cheek and looked into his innocent, trusting blue eyes. "Sweetheart, you can like whatever you like. Whether that's princesses or painting or anything. <em>Anything</em> that makes you happy without hurting anyone else is more than okay. It's <em>good</em>, and it doesn't make you any less of an alpha. As long as you are kind and respectful of others and of yourself you are a good alpha, and I will never be disappointed in you. I promise." </p><p>Jack considered this. Then, with the unique ability of childhood to treat all moments equally important and unimportant simultaneously, he said, "Okay" before closing his eyes and falling asleep. </p><p>Once again, Castiel lingered on the edge of the bed, watching him breathe, but the peace was marred by worrying thoughts. How much longer could Jack's sweet, innocent soul survive in this house? More than a few times in the past couple years, Castiel had heard the little alpha unconsciously parroting Michael's views on things. In the limited time he had with his son, he did his best to instill different lessons. <em>His</em> lessons were always about love and acceptance, both of others and of yourself, but he feared he was fighting a losing battle. His heart clenched as he realized he was running out of time. </p><p>As he brushed his fingers through the silky strands of Jack's hair, he reached a decision. As soon as he and Dean got home, they would talk to Sam. It was time to stop playing by Michael's rules, and time to stop begging for what was already his. One way or another, he was getting his son back. <em>He</em> was going to raise his sweet little boy and teach him what it really meant to be a good man. </p><p>Castiel quietly slipped out of the room leaving the door open a crack as Jack preferred, and walked down the hall to the guest room. He intended to tell Dean about his decision immediately, but when he opened the door, he jerked to a stop, all coherent thoughts fleeing his mind at the sight that greeted him. </p><p>Dean knelt on the carpet beside the big bed, barefoot and shirtless. He'd left his jeans on, presumably in case someone other than Castiel came into the room first. His ass rested comfortably on his heels, allowing him to hold the position for an extended time without his legs getting tired, and his hands rested on his thighs. Castiel had seen Dean in this position so many times that it took no effort at all to see him naked in his mind's eye. The alpha's head had been bowed, but when he heard the door open, he looked up, locked eyes with Castiel, and then, never breaking eye contact, deliberately tilted his head back, baring his throat. </p><p>Castiel's brain came back online enough to prompt him to close the door, but when he glanced over and saw the things laid out on the bed, his cognitive abilities stuttered to a halt once more. </p><p>Ropes. The most beautiful ropes he had ever seen, made from intricately braided strands of gold, red, and dark green, the colors mingling in the tassels at the ends of each length. </p><p>Castiel approached the bed as if in a dream and picked up a rope about as long as his arm. It flowed smoothly through his fingers. Real silk, soft and supple. These must have cost a pretty penny, but he wasn't about to comment on that. He was sure Dean had bought them hoping they would please Castiel, but all Castiel could think was that these were the only ropes he'd ever seen that were worthy to bind a sub as lovely and good as Dean. </p><p>"Sorry, Omega." </p><p>Castiel blinked and looked down at Dean. What on earth was he apologizing for?<br/> <br/>Dean held out his hands, palms up, wrists together. "You'll have to wrap your present yourself." </p><p><em>Oh</em>.</p><p>Castiel made a concerted effort to gather his thoughts. The way he handled the next few minutes was crucial. Dean was already half in subspace. He was completely relaxed except for his arms, and his eyes were hazy and a little unfocused. If Castiel said the wrong thing, or even the right thing in the wrong tone, his sub would perceive it as a rejection of this beautiful gift and of him. </p><p>Castiel gently circled his hands around Dean's wrists, pulling his arms down to his sides as he sank to his own knees in front of him. "Dean," he said gently but firmly, catching his sub's attention by bringing his hands up to frame the alpha's face and looking him in the eye. He was deliberately not calling him 'Alpha' because this wasn't a scene and couldn't be allowed to become a scene. "I want you to listen to me very carefully. Are you listening?" </p><p>Dean nodded, his attention fully on his Dom. </p><p>"I love this."<em> I love you.</em> "This is the most wonderful gift anyone has ever given me, and I do want to use these beautiful things with you, to see you wrapped up in them like the precious gift you are, my good, beautiful, perfect Alpha." He pressed a chaste kiss to Dean's forehead before adding, "But we can't scene tonight. Not here." </p><p>Dean's brow furrowed right where Castiel's lips had touched it. </p><p>"Please understand me, Dean," Castiel rushed on, anticipating Dean's train of thought from long experience and heading it off at the pass. "This has nothing to do with shame or embarrassment about the nature of our sexual relationship. This is purely about safety. If we are interrupted at the wrong moment, I may not have the time or the privacy necessary to care for you properly, and I <em>won't</em> put you at risk like that. It would be irresponsible of me, both as your Dom and your—" He almost said <em>'your Omega'</em>, but he caught himself just in time. "Your friend. Do you understand?"</p><p>Dean nodded, and Castiel was relieved to see that his eyes were clearer, but the peace of submission was gone from his expression as well. "Yeah. Sorry. I should have… I mean, I shouldn't have assumed." </p><p>The bitter sadness and disappointment in his scent made Castiel's inner omega whine pitifully, and he didn't even try to resist the instinct to pull the alpha into his arms, guiding Dean's nose to his scent gland on the same side as the claiming bite. </p><p>Dean accepted the offered comfort eagerly, shivering slightly as he wrapped his arms tightly around Castiel's waist. </p><p>Castiel stroked his bare back and murmured soothing words into his hair. "Shhh. It's okay. We're okay. I'm not upset with you. You didn't do anything wrong. Hopefully the weather will have cleared up tomorrow morning, and we can go home where we can put these beautiful ropes to good use." Remembering the surprise hidden in his dresser at home, he added mischievously, "They'll match the new panties I bought for you perfectly." </p><p>Dean lifted his head, and Castiel was glad to see a wide smile on his face at last. "Really?"<br/> <br/>"Mmhmm. Green lace embroidered with red rosebuds and a large red rose on each hip. You're going to look so pretty in them. I'll wrap the ropes around your torso to make a matching harness." Castiel traced the shape of it with his fingers as he spoke, imagining how the intricate braid of the ropes would crisscross Dean's chest, ribs, and stomach, how they would move with his every breath, how they would strain as he writhed with pleasure under Castiel. "And I'll finish it all off with a pretty bow around your pretty neck." </p><p>Dean's scent grew stronger and spicier with every word until Castiel could almost taste it, so he wasn't surprised when Dean licked his lips and said in a rough voice, "Uh, Cas, if you're not planning to fuck me tonight, you should probably stop talking dirty to me." </p><p>"Who says I'm not planning to fuck you?" </p><p>Dean frowned. "Uh, you did? Just a few minutes ago?" </p><p>"I said we couldn't scene tonight. I never said," Castiel leaned forward until his lips brushed Dean's, "we couldn't fuck." </p><p>They did occasionally have sex without a scene of any kind. Castiel thought back to Charlie's New Year's Eve party last year. (She had been less than pleased to find them screwing in <em>her</em> bed half an hour before midnight.) </p><p>"I mean," he drew back to look Dean in the eye coyly, "if you want to." Because safe, sane, and <em>consensual</em> always applied, scene or no scene. </p><p>"Yes. Fuck, yes," Dean breathed right before diving in for the kind of frantic, hungry, impatient, uncoordinated kiss they never got to have when they were scening; where everything was so carefully controlled and a part of Castiel always had to remain above the lust, watching for the slightest signal that his sub was reaching his limits. </p><p>The next few minutes were a blur. Somehow Castiel's clothes disappeared in between kisses, and so did Dean's jeans and underwear. They fell into the big bed, a tangle of grasping, needy limbs, with hands and mouths seeking out every sweet spot on each other's bodies that they knew of (which was pretty much all of them after five years). As much as Castiel loved dominating Dean and receiving the precious gift of his submission, that privilege of caring for him at his most vulnerable, it also felt good to occasionally let go and indulge in some impulsive, unplanned, see-where-the-moment-takes-us sex. </p><p>In the end, Dean wound up on top of Castiel. Their naked bodies were pressed together from chest to hips with Castiel's legs wrapped around Dean's waist, and their cocks lined up just right. Dean nudged Castiel's head back and sucked at his pulse point. His glasses bumped awkwardly against Castiel's jaw, but both of them were too lost in pleasure to care. Dean nipped at the vulnerable skin with his teeth, pulling a groan out of the omega. Sharp alpha teeth could rip Castiel's throat out if they wanted to, but not for a second did Castiel feel any fear. It wasn't a matter of finding the danger arousing, there simply wasn't any danger. He was always safe in Dean's arms. </p><p>Castiel became aware of something other than the blanket under his ass. Something soft but textured. "Wait. Stop, Dean," he gasped. </p><p>Dean yanked himself back as if Castiel's skin had burned him. "What? Did I hurt—" </p><p>"You didn't do anything wrong," Castiel hastily assured him for the second time that night, "and I'm not changing my mind. I just don't want these lovely ropes to get lost or damaged before we even have a chance to use them." He sat up and pulled the length of rope he'd been lying on out from under him. "Let's put these somewhere safe before we get any more carried away, okay?" </p><p>"Oh." Dean blushed and smiled sheepishly, a thread of embarrassment cutting through the arousal in his scent. "Yeah. Course." He scrambled off the bed, gathered up the ropes, and went to tuck them safely away in his suitcase. </p><p>Castiel lounged back on his elbows, shamelessly admiring the naked alpha. Even the back of his neck was blushing. How he could be both so incredibly sexy and so cutely adorable at the same time was just unfair. </p><p>Dean straightened up and turned around, smirking when he caught Castiel ogling him. "Were you checking out my ass?" </p><p>Castiel shrugged. "Among other things. It <em>is</em> a very nice ass." </p><p>Dean laughed and climbed back onto the bed, prowling toward Castiel on all fours until he was caging the omega in with his body. "Glad you think so." Green eyes darted down to where Castiel's hard cock curved up against his stomach, and then back to Castiel's face. "Speaking of my ass, when you said you wanted to fuck, did you mean…" </p><p>"Yes," Castiel said hoarsely. "If you want." </p><p>The mingled scents of hearth fires and thunderstorms filled the air between them and around them. It smelled like <em>home</em> and <em>mate</em>. At least, that was what it smelled like to Castiel. He wanted to bathe in that scent every day for the rest of his life. He wanted to drown in it. It should have scared him how easily he could get lost in this, in Dean; how easy to forget the consequences of falling. It should have, but he had Dean's claiming bite on his neck, his alpha in bed with him, and his inner omega was purring, <em>mine mine, my Alpha, he wants me, mine mine</em>, and it was just too hard to remember why this was dangerous when he felt so safe.</p><p>"I always want," Dean said, and Castiel's heart twisted painfully. Of course this was just sex for Dean. Castiel was just the most convenient option. <em>It could just as easily be Benny, and it wouldn't make a difference to Dean as long as he gets a dick up his ass.</em> But then Dean surged forward to kiss him again, and all thought was driven from Castiel's mind. </p><p>They kissed and rutted together for long minutes, and with every exquisite roll of Dean's hips, Castiel felt himself leaking more and more slick. "Roll over," he murmured the next time they came up for air. "I can start prepping you now." </p><p>Dean obligingly flipped onto his back and opened his legs for Castiel to kneel between them. Even though this wasn't a scene, there was still something intoxicating about Dean's easy cooperation, his perfect, unquestioning trust. It made Castiel want to cover the alpha in kisses, worship every inch of his body, and beg for the right to spend the rest of his life making Dean feel safe and loved. </p><p>Instead he gathered some of his own slick on his fingers and reached down to circle Dean's hole, massaging the outer muscles and gently encouraging Dean to relax before he attempted to fit even one finger inside. Just because he wasn't Domming tonight didn't mean he would risk hurting Dean to satisfy his own needs a little quicker. </p><p>Dean whined and shifted his hips impatiently, trying to get Castiel's fingers where he wanted them. "Come on, Cas. I'm not a virgin. I've done this like a thousand times. You're not gonna break me." </p><p>Castiel pinched Dean's ass with his free hand. "We'll get there. God, I always forget what a brat you are when you're not subbing."</p><p>"Yeah, and you're the one who said nothing but vanilla sex tonight, so I get to be as bratty and impatient as I want and there's nothing you can do about it." </p><p>Castiel raised an eyebrow. "I could just refuse to fuck you." </p><p>Dean's head popped up off the pillow. "You wouldn't!" The pouting look he gave Castiel really shouldn't have made him <em>more</em> attractive, yet somehow it did. </p><p>"You're very lucky I can't punish you tonight," Castiel grumbled as he finally sank a finger into Dean's tight heat. </p><p>It also shouldn't be possible to moan smugly, but Dean managed that too. </p><p>For the next several minutes, Castiel made it his mission to take Dean apart as thoroughly as possible while quietly plotting his revenge. By the time he had worked up to three fingers, Dean was a needy, writhing mess, panting, "Fuck, fuck, fuck," over and over. </p><p>"Hold that thought," Castiel said, pulling his fingers out of Dean and wiping them clean on Hannah's duvet. (Fortunately, there was nothing other than slick on them.) Mirroring Dean's actions earlier, he climbed off the bed, went over to Dean's suitcase, and took out the shortest length of rope. </p><p>When he turned back around, Dean was in Castiel's earlier position, propped up on his elbow, his eyes dark pools of want behind his glasses. However, unlike Castiel, his skin was flushed all over, and his hair plastered flat in places from pressing his head into the pillows as he arched his spine in pleasure while Castiel was massaging his prostate. There were also some patches of hair adorably sticking straight up like a hedgehog. His cock drooled pre-come, making a shiny wet patch just above his navel, and he smelled fucking <em>delicious!</em></p><p>His brow furrowed when he saw the rope in Castiel's hands. </p><p>"I'm not tying you up," Castiel said. "However, since this <em>is</em> my Christmas present, I do think it should be properly wrapped." He flicked his gaze pointedly down to Dean's cock. "May I?" </p><p>Dean swallowed hard. "Yeah. Go ahead." </p><p>Now it was Castiel's turn to prowl predatorily towards Dean and loom over him. As he wrapped the rope around Dean's cock just below where his knot would pop, he heard Dean give a mewl of pleasure at the sensation. He tied the rope loosely so it wouldn't cut off circulation or prevent Dean from coming, and he finished it off with a bow right on top of Dean's balls, the tasseled ends brushing his ass. The effect was quite artistic if he did say so himself. He wished he could take a picture, but he knew Dean wouldn't be comfortable with that, so he contented himself with a long stare to fix the image in his mind.  </p><p>He raised his eyes to Dean's face and found the alpha staring down at his festive dick with a strange expression. "Dean? If you don't like it, we can take it off." </p><p>"No." Dean shook his head and looked up at Castiel. "No, it feels good. Um…" He laughed self-consciously and looked back down at the rope bow. "It's kind of like the first time I tried on panties, you know? I thought it would look ridiculous, but it actually makes me feel kind of… pretty." He flopped back onto the pillows and put his hands over his face, knocking his glasses askew. Embarrassment soured his scent. "God, I am so screwed up." </p><p>"Hey! No, you're not!" Castiel pulled Dean's hands away from his face and righted his glasses so he could clearly see Castiel glaring sternly at him. "I <em>just</em> got done explaining to my son that there is nothing wrong with an alpha liking princess movies. Well, there is nothing wrong with an alpha liking lace and silk and feeling pretty either. That is your father talking, not you. If it brings you happiness without hurting anyone else, then it is <em>good</em>. End of discussion." </p><p>Dean reached up to cup Castiel's cheek, and Castiel couldn't help but to lean into the touch. "You know you're the only person who can say shit like that to me and actually make me believe it," Dean said with a soft smile.</p><p>Castiel had to forcefully remind himself that the warmth in Dean's eyes was gratitude and platonic affection, not romantic love. "Guess I'm special," he said in a weak attempt at deflection. </p><p>"You have no idea," Dean murmured, which was not the response Castiel had expected, but before he could read too much into it, Dean's hand slid around to the back of his neck and dragged him into a kiss, and once again Castiel's brain was filled with white noise, not a single coherent thought to be found.</p><p>~o0o~</p><p><em>Shit, shit, shit.</em> He had almost slipped up. No, he <em>had</em> slipped up. Fortunately he knew exactly how to kiss Cas to short out his higher brain functions. He flicked his tongue against the roof of the omega's mouth, eliciting a shudder, a moan, and a wave of thunderstorm scent that made Dean's dick twitch. This, of course, made him suddenly hyper-aware all over again of the bow tied around his dick, and fuck, why was that so fucking <em>hot</em>?<br/> <br/>He decided not to worry about it. Cas was right. That was John Winchester's toxic alpha bullshit talking. What did it matter why it felt good? It just did, and since it wasn't hurting anyone, he was going to just enjoy it, and everyone else could go to hell. It wasn't like anyone but Cas was ever going to know about this anyway. </p><p>Of course, it was always easier to ignore the voices in his head when he gave control over to Cas and let himself sink into that happy, floaty, quiet place where the only voice that mattered was his Dom telling him he was a good alpha, he was perfect, he had nothing to be ashamed of. He couldn't have that tonight, but he could have the next best thing. </p><p>"So are you gonna fuck me or what?" he said, nibbling teasingly on Cas' lower lip. </p><p>"Oh, I'm gonna fuck you," Cas growled, pushing him back down into the pillows. "I'm gonna fuck you so good you forget how to use that bratty mouth to say anything but my name." </p><p>Ohhh, yeah. Now they were cooking with gas. Cas hiked Dean's legs up around his waist, shoved a spare pillow under his lower back, and then practically dragged Dean onto his cock in one smooth thrust. Dean groaned, rolling his hips to help Cas along. The stretch and burn was toeing the line between pleasure and pain, but Cas had prepped him well enough that he wasn't worried about injuring himself. Dean always did it a little rougher when he wasn't subbing. It helped distract him from all those pesky insecurities about bottoming.<br/> <br/>"Are you alright, Dean?" Cas asked once he was fully sheathed inside the alpha, his balls resting snugly against Dean's ass. "Do you need a minute?"<br/> <br/>"No. Fuck." </p><p>"No, you're not alright, or no, you don't need a minute? I need you to be clear." Dean would have been more annoyed if it hadn't sounded like Cas was really struggling to keep still long enough to check in with Dean. </p><p>"No, I don't need a minute. Fuck. Move. Please move." </p><p>And holy shit, Cas <em>moved!</em> It took him a few tries to locate Dean's prostate, but Dean was already riding high on the glorious feeling of Cas inside him and their combined scents swirling around them in a heady cocktail that smelled to Dean like <em>mate</em> and <em>home</em>. He barely needed that extra punch of pleasure when Cas did finally hit the sweet spot. God, he could probably come just from the <em>sight</em> of Cas fucking him, tattooed biceps flexing as he pulled Dean down on his cock again and again. The way that those black feathers moved as Cas moved, Dean could easily imagine the ink wings coming alive, lifting from Cas' shoulders and spreading out behind him. Castiel, an avenging angel with flashing blue lightning eyes. It was definitely sacrilegious how hot Dean found that image. </p><p>Dean's cock slapped his belly with every thrust, and he could feel the texture of the rope, the tassels swishing softly against his ass. He made the mistake of looking down, and fuck fuck <em>fuck</em>, the juxtaposition of Cas' cock splitting him open and that pretty bow around his own painfully hard dick, his knot beginning to swell just above it, was possibly the single most erotic thing he had ever seen in his life, and shit, he was gonna come. </p><p>"Let go, Dean," Cas panted, picking up on it in Dean's scent and quickening the pace of his thrusts. "Let it happen, and then you can finish me with your mouth." </p><p>"Cas," Dean whined as he thought of sucking that cock, the same one currently pushing relentlessly into his prostate. It would be coated in Cas' slick too. He loved the taste of Cas' sli— "Ahhhh. Uh, uh, unguhhh." His vision whited out as his orgasm overtook him, and for a few seconds he was only aware of spine melting, toe curling pleasure radiating out from his cock and his prostate to every inch of his body. </p><p>When he came down enough to notice his surroundings again, he sensed immediately that something was wrong. Cas' scent had changed from thunderstorms to stagnant water, and he wasn't looking at Dean but at the door. </p><p>The door which was open. </p><p>Cas had definitely closed it behind him when he came in, but he must not have locked it because it was open now, and there was a laundry basket laying on its side just inside the doorway, clean clothes spilling out of it, and there were footsteps retreating quickly down the stairs. </p><p>"Shit. Hannah?" </p><p>Cas nodded. He had already pulled out of Dean, and he was softening quickly, mood officially killed. Dean felt loose, empty, and completely unsatisfied despite the fact that he had one of the best orgasms of his life less than two minutes ago. His knot had popped, but it was deflating as quickly as Cas' dick, and the rope slipped off without even needing to be untied. </p><p>Cas scrambled off the bed and closed the door again while Dean looked around frantically for something to clean himself up with. In addition to his own come all over his chest and stomach, he could feel Cas' slick starting to leak back out of his ass. </p><p>"Here." Cas tossed him a clean hand towel from the pile of laundry on the floor. </p><p>They cleaned up and dressed as quickly as possible, but it was still a few minutes before they were presentable. Even then, 'presentable' might have been a stretch. Cas' hair might always kind of look like he'd just had sex, but this was definitely a different level of messy, not to mention his reddened lips and the hickey Dean had put on his neck where only a turtleneck could have covered it. Dean was sure he himself didn't look any less debauched, and there was no doubt that he was going to be walking funny for at least a few hours. </p><p>"She's probably told Michael by now," Cas said, looking at the door like it led to the gallows. He looked at Dean again, and there was panic in his eyes, the panic of a cornered animal. "Will you come with me? I don't… I don't think I can face them alone." </p><p>Dean pulled him into a hug, the rotten stench of the omega's fear triggering every protective instinct he had. "Of course I will. We're in this together. I won't leave you. Not ever." It was dangerously honest, but it calmed Cas, and that was all that mattered right now.<br/> <br/>"Thank you," Cas murmured into Dean's neck. He clung tightly to the alpha for a few more moments before drawing back to take Dean's face between his hands, just as he had when he was explaining why they couldn't scene tonight. (A good call. Dealing with drop would have made this situation so, <em>so</em> much worse.) "Dean," he said, staring intently into Dean's eyes in that soul-gazing way of his, "there is nothing wrong with you, and there is nothing wrong with what we just did. Whatever happens, whatever Michael says, I need you to remember that. Can you do that for me?" </p><p>Dean's heart swelled with so much love it hurt. Cas was clearly terrified that he had just lost any chance of regaining custody of his son, yet he was still taking care of Dean, wrapping him up in protective wings. Dean nodded mutely. </p><p>"Say it out loud. Please."</p><p>Dean swallowed down the lump in his throat. "There is nothing wrong with me." He even believed it. At least for that moment. </p><p>Cas smiled, and his scent sweetened a bit. "My good Alpha," he murmured and kissed Dean softly. It was just the briefest chaste brush of warm lips, but Dean held the memory of that kiss and those three little words (not the words he longed to hear, but they were close enough) at the front of his mind as he and Cas walked down the stairs, side by side, hand in hand. </p><p>~o0o~</p><p>Hannah was standing in the doorway of the living room with Michael. She was very pale, her distress bleeding clearly into her scent. Michael smelled calmer, but his mouth was pressed into that thin line of disapproval Castiel had been familiar with since childhood. He gripped Dean's hand a little harder, and Dean squeezed back, a silent reassurance that he wasn't going anywhere. Dean's support would help him keep his head. </p><p>"It's alright, Omega," Michael said quietly to his mate. "I'll take care of this. Leave us." </p><p>Hannah ducked her head and hurried away towards the kitchen, refusing to make eye contact with either Castiel or Dean. Castiel wasn't sure if that was because she felt guilty for ratting them out or because she was embarrassed about what she had seen them doing. Likely it was a bit of both. </p><p>When Hannah was out of sight, Michael just eyed them in icy silence for a few seconds. Castiel wanted to take charge of the situation instead of standing here waiting for Michael's judgment, but blurting out <em>'We didn't do anything wrong' </em>would put him on the defensive.<br/> <br/>"I wish I could say I'm even a little bit shocked," Michael said at last, "but to be perfectly honest, I suspected there was something of this," he grimaced in distaste, "disgusting nature going on. It was painfully obvious where the balance of power lay in this relationship." </p><p>Castiel could detect the faintest whiff of burnt toast emanating from Dean, but the alpha remained a solid, unwavering presence at Castiel's side, using the tricks he had learned from dealing with his father to control his scent. He doubted Michael would be able to pick up on the subtleties of Dean's scent unless he was completely overwhelmed.</p><p>"What Hannah saw," Castiel said, barely resisting the urge to growl at his brother (challenging Michael's inner alpha like that would <em>not</em> help the situation), "had nothing to do with power or dominance. It was two equals giving each other pleasure in a perfectly natural way. And to be <em>perfectly honest</em>, our sex life is none of your business, nor does it have any bearing on my fitness as a parent." </p><p>"Oh, I think it does. Obviously I can't stop you from mating this pathetic excuse for an alpha." Michael didn't even deign to look at Dean as he said this. "But I will not allow you to expose my son to such perversion." </p><p>"<em>My</em> son! <em>Not</em> yours!" This time a growl did break through the words. </p><p>Michael just smiled, cold and full of sharp alpha teeth. "No. Not since you signed over legal custody to me, remember? You gave me the right to do anything I deem necessary to protect Jack's interests, which was frankly the only good parenting decision you have ever made. I have been extremely lenient, allowing you to visit him whenever you wished, allowing him to spend weekends with you, but all that ends now. From now on, you will have one <em>supervised</em> visit per month which will be conducted here with either Hannah or myself present at <em>all</em> times. Dean is <em>not</em> invited. In fact, if I see him anywhere near this house or Jack again after you leave tomorrow, I will get an official restraining order. Do I make myself clear?" </p><p>Castiel could feel the blood pounding in his ears, but this time it was anger, not panic. "It seems you've left me no choice," he said flatly, knowing that Michael in his arrogance would interpret that as surrender. </p><p>Michael nodded curtly. "I'm glad we understand one another. And there's no need to discuss any of this in front of Jack tomorrow." Translation: <em>We'll pretend this never happened.</em> A Novak family specialty. The implied <em>or you will never see Jack again</em> was obvious. </p><p>Castiel turned on his heel and started back upstairs, tugging Dean along behind him. Back in their room, he closed the door and locked it before finally letting go of Dean's hand. The sight of the debauched bed with its sheets and blankets twisted every which way stained with slick and come, and the rope lying in the center, still tied in a bow, made Castiel desperately wish that he could turn back time, be warm and safe and tangled up with Dean again behind this locked door. He hadn't gotten to come, but he doubted either of them could get back in the mood now. </p><p>As the adrenaline ebbed from his bloodstream, he suddenly felt his legs trembling under him and half collapsed onto the edge of the bed. Dean sat down beside him, and he automatically leaned into his alpha's warmth. They ended up in a kind of sideways hug, Dean cradling Castiel to his chest, his chin resting on top of Castiel's head. </p><p>Castiel wasn't sure when he started to cry. It began gently, a few silent tears trickling down his cheeks, but then the dam broke and he was sobbing, trying to muffle the noise in Dean's shirt. Dean didn't shush him, or tell him not to cry, or offer empty platitudes about how it would be okay and they would figure it out. He just held Castiel tight, his warm maple scent wrapping around the omega as surely as his strong arms, and let him get it all out. When he ran out of tears, Castiel felt spent. He was exhausted both physically and emotionally, but he also felt clearheaded.<br/> <br/>"Can you text Sam and set up a meeting for me?" he asked a little croakily, peeling his cheek off of Dean's damp shirt. </p><p>"Course," Dean said, reaching for his phone. "You want me to come along?" </p><p>"Yes, please." </p><p>Dean spent a few minutes tapping at his phone screen while Castiel wiped his eyes, blew his nose, and generally tried to feel more like a human being and less like a walking blob of tears and snot. </p><p>"Okay. All set. He says we can come by his office tomorrow around noon, and he's giving you the friends and family discount which is Sammy-speak for pro bono." </p><p>"What? No!" Castiel protested. "I can't let him do that."</p><p>Dean held up his hands. "Look, you can try to pay him, but knowing him, if he does take your money, he'll just donate it to some charity for homeless kids or something. You might as well skip the middle man and donate the money yourself." </p><p>Castiel smiled at that despite the fear still sitting like a stone in his stomach. "The Winchester boys," he said, shaking his head fondly. "Selfless to a fault." </p><p>Dean gave a bark of laughter. "I am far from selfless." </p><p>"You're here with me, aren't you?" Castiel pointed out. "What did you get out of all this besides a truly awful Christmas?"<br/> <br/>Dean shrugged. "Hardly the worst Christmas of my life. I got to play in the snow with you and Jack. That was fun." </p><p>Castiel smiled again, and it felt a little more natural this time. "Yes, that was fun. And with Sam's help, we'll get to do it again next winter." He had to believe that. He had to believe that they <em>would</em> win. He couldn't even entertain the thought of losing his son for good. </p><p>They folded the clean laundry that was still spilled all over the floor and packed their suitcases so they would be ready to leave as soon as possible tomorrow. Dean unknotted the rope and tucked it away with the others. </p><p>The bed still reeked of sex, but they weren't about to leave the room or ask Hannah for fresh sheets. They changed into pajamas and crawled under the covers. This time there was no awkward moment of trying to stay on their respective sides. As soon as Dean had deposited his glasses safely on the nightstand with his phone and they had turned out the lights, they both shuffled to the middle of the bed without discussion, laying face to face on a single pillow. </p><p>Castiel traced the lines of Dean's face with his fingertips in the dark. "Dean?"</p><p>"Hmm?" </p><p>He swallowed down his own emotions because Dean needed to hear this, no matter how painful it was for Castiel to say. "I want you to know that even though we're not a couple like we've been pretending to be, I  think you're a wonderful role model for Jack, and I want you to be a part of his life, as much as you're comfortable being. Michael was right about one thing. Kids need both alphas and omegas to learn from, but those alphas and omegas don't always have to be their parents. I would be very proud for my son to grow up to be as good an alpha and as good a man as you are."  </p><p>Dean was silent for a moment, and if not for his scent, Castiel would have thought he had fallen asleep. Then he heard a faint sniffle and a slightly choked, "Thanks, Cas." </p><p>He kissed Dean's forehead, and gradually they drifted off in each other's arms. Tomorrow they would have a lot of difficult things to do, but they would do them together.       </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>*peeks out from behind the couch*<br/>HAPPY ENDING TAG, REMEMBER?!<br/>*dives for cover again*</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Kudos and comments are love. 😘</p></blockquote></div></div>
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